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TV Listings

Monday 22 December

06:20 The King of Queens

Flower Power: Doug desperately tries but fails to be romantic. And Arthur is called up for jury duty.

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06:45 The King of Queens

Whine Country: When she ends up on a holiday of Doug's choosing, Carrie makes sure he'll be as miserable as her by inviting Arthur along...

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07:10 Everybody Loves Raymond

Season's Greetings: Marie is jealous when she receives a letter from a relative saying how wonderful her life is.

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07:35 Frasier

Dinner Party: Frasier and Niles decide to throw a dinner party but can't agree on who they should invite.

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08:00 Frasier

Taps at the Montana: Niles wants his apartment back but must face up to both the snooty neighbours who think he is a menace and the person who is renting from him.

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08:35 The Neverending Story II...

...The Next Chapter: (1990) Fantasy adventure. The hero, Bastian (Jonathan Brandis), returns to the mysterious land of Fantasia, where he joins a mission to save the Childlike Princess.

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10:15 The Big Bang Theory

The Maternal Capacitance: A disastrous visit from Leonard's mother Beverly has the unexpected side-effect of bringing Leonard and Penny closer together.

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10:45 The Big Bang Theory

The Cushion Saturation: A game of paintball leads to a squabble when Penny accidentally shoots paint at one of Sheldon's cushions. Romance blossoms between Howard and Leslie.

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11:15 The Simpsons

Homer and Lisa Exchange Cross Words: Lisa finds that she has a knack for doing crosswords and enters a tournament, where Homer thinks he can make money by betting she will lose.

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11:50 White Christmas

(1954) Classic festive musical. Bing Crosby and Danny Kaye star as ex-servicemen who stage a spectacular musical to save their former commanding officer's business.

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14:10 A Place in the Sun: Home or Away

Lisa and Stuart Newby are torn between a holiday home for their family on Yorkshire's dinosaur coast or the Costa Granadina in Spain.

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15:10 Countdown

In the second of three special episodes, two senior female players return to the show: Priscilla Munday v Eileen Taylor, with guest Arlene Phillips in Dictionary Corner.

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16:00 Deal or No Deal: Merry Christmas

Snow is falling and sleigh bells are ringing, meaning only one thing - Christmas is coming to The Dream Factory. And Christmas could come early with an opportunity to win a dream holiday.

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17:00 Come Dine with Me Christmas...

...Special: Festive celebrity special featuring singer Jona Lewie, Maizie Williams of Boney M, singer VV Brown, DJ Toby Anstis, a ride on a camel and some saucy gifts from secret Santa.

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18:00 The Simpsons

Treehouse of Horror IX: Three scary stories including Hell Toupée. It's his third strike, and Snake is sent to the electric chair. Plus, The Terror of Tiny Toon and Starship Poopers.

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18:30 Hollyoaks

Sienna's lies fail to allay Theresa's suspicions about Dodger's whereabouts. Rick manipulates those around him to get what he wants and upsets Robbie in the process.

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19:00 Channel 4 News

Channel 4 News reports live from Glasgow, where a refuse truck has careered along the street and crashed into a city centre hotel. There are a number of deaths and many casualties.

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20:00 Gadget Man's Guide to Christmas

Richard Ayoade presents an indispensable guide to improving Christmas with gadgets that help you shop, wrap presents, beat the weather, improve your carol singing and even cook the dinner.

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21:00 Food Unwrapped's Christmas Dinner

Jimmy, Kate and Matt find out the truth about festive food. Why is farmed salmon pink? Can you eat frankincense? Is the gold in drinks real gold? Can you grow a chicken as big as a turkey?

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22:00 Derek - The Special

The award-winning comedy drama by Ricky Gervais returns for one last time. As Broadhill prepares for the wedding of the year, Kev's behaviour proves too much for Hannah.

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23:05 Gogglebox

Britain's favourite opinionated viewers on: Casino Royale, Catchphrase, The Missing, Nigellissima, Morecambe & Wise, The X Factor and the News.

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00:00 NFL: The American Football Show

Vernon Kay presents the top moments from the best games of Week 16 of the NFL. Nat Coombs is on hand with analysis and media reaction from across the pond.

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01:00 World on a String

This high energy film takes a look at the world of competitive yo-yoing, following four players as they prepare for the World Yo-Yo Contest, in a story of innovation and self-expression.

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01:55 The Tree of Life

(2011) Terrence Malick's visionary drama puts a man's midlife doubts in the context of the origins, evolution and meaning of life on Earth. With Brad Pitt, Sean Penn and Jessica Chastain.

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04:15 Fantastic Voyage

(1966) Classic sci-fi adventure. Raquel Welch and Donald Pleasence are among the crew of a miniaturised submarine that's injected into an injured diplomat's body in order to save his life.

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05:55 Small Animal Hospital

Nico, a Japanese Akita, needs emergency treatment after colliding with his brother. And can presenter John Barrowman help fat cat Oscar shed some of his unwanted pounds?

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09:00 Come Dine with Me

Celebrity Christmas Special: There's festive cheer aplenty for the competitors: drum and bass DJ Goldie; 70s crooner Tony Christie; Blue Peter's Janet Ellis; and actress Susie Amy.

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10:00 A Place in the Sun: Home or Away

Stephen and Stuart have £250,000 to spend on a second home they can rent out. Luke Doonan and Laura Hamilton show them places in the Lake District, and further afield in Sitges, Spain.

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11:00 A Place in the Sun: Home or Away

Laura Hamilton and Jonnie Irwin help Alan and Ruth find two new properties to buy, one in Murcia, south-eastern Spain, and the other in Exeter.

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12:00 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent

In Warrington, Phil helps Pauline and Alan Jacks, and Colin Brunold, find house buyers in a town that is a bit of a dark horse in terms of property values.

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13:00 Come Dine with Me

Celebrity Christmas Special: Music impresario David Gest joins in a festive clash with former EastEnder Hannah Waterman, TV gardener Diarmuid Gavin and Loose Women presenter Sherrie Hewson.

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14:00 Come Dine with Me

Four passionate cooks from Surrey battle it out in a week of top-quality cooking and eccentric table talk of 'death rooms' and aristocracy.

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15:00 Heston's Christmas Feast

Heston Blumenthal's ultimate festive feast includes a lavish appetiser loved by King Charles II made from a bizarre ingredient, and an edible dormouse treat favoured at Roman banquets.

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16:00 Jamie's Festive Feast

Jamie Oliver celebrates the lazy winter days at the end of the year. Filmed at his Essex home, Jamie's wind-down foods include perfect winter warmers like oozy cheesy pasta.

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17:00 Location, Location, Location

Kirstie Allsopp and Phil Spencer visit west London, where property is expensive and sells fast. They help newly-weds Keon and Zoe in Shepherd's Bush, and Paul and Carolyn in Richmond.

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18:00 Location, Location, Location

Phil Spencer goes house-hunting in the desirable suburbs of south Manchester with Craig and Becki, while Kirstie Allsopp ploughs the rolling Cheshire countryside with Chris and Amy.

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19:00 Posh Pawn at Christmas

In this Christmas Special, James shocks the team by offering free valuations for charity. Caprice sells a designer dress for a worthy cause. And the staff prepare for their Christmas party.

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20:00 George Clarke's Amazing Spaces...

Christmas Special: There's a flat-pack tin church, a luxury converted chapel, ice carving in a Liverpool wonderland, and a catch-up with some of George's best builds of the year.

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21:00 24 Hours in A&E

Retired builder Roger has fallen four metres from his daughter's roof. And Tad, who's 29, has come to St George's with a dangerously high heart rate, which could possibly lead to a stroke.

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22:00 One Born Every Minute

Two couples experiencing unexpected difficulties during pregnancy arrive at the hospital. Billie, who's 17, has pre-eclampsia and needs an emergency caesarean 10 weeks before her due date.

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23:05 Gadget Man's Guide to Christmas

Richard Ayoade presents an indispensable guide to improving Christmas with gadgets that help you shop, wrap presents, beat the weather, improve your carol singing and even cook the dinner.

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00:05 Food Unwrapped's Christmas Dinner

Jimmy, Kate and Matt find out the truth about festive food. Why is farmed salmon pink? Can you eat frankincense? Is the gold in drinks real gold? Can you grow a chicken as big as a turkey?

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01:05 Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares USA

Gordon Ramsay heads to Beaver, Pennsylvania, where he finds a brother-and-sister team who are unable to work together in a positive manner at Italian restaurant Levanti's.

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02:00 Gogglebox

Britain's favourite opinionated viewers on: Casino Royale, Catchphrase, The Missing, Nigellissima, Morecambe & Wise, The X Factor and the News.

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02:55 Embarrassing Bodies

Some of the show's most inspirational cases return to the clinic having battled cancer and the scars it has left them with. The show catches up with Julie, Natalie, and Josh.

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03:50 Come Dine with Me

Four passionate cooks from Surrey battle it out in a week of top-quality cooking and eccentric table talk of 'death rooms' and aristocracy.

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08:00 BSL Zone: Punk Chef Kids Challenge

Part 2 of 2. Punk Chef's competition for the Best Young Deaf Chef reaches the final. Who will win the coveted trophy?

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11:00 Addams Family Values

(1993) Family comedy horror. The Addams Family welcome baby Pubert to the clan. But sister Wednesday (Christina Ricci) and brother Pugsley (Jimmy Workman) are less than friendly...

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12:50 The War of the Worlds

(1953) Sci-fi adventure. Gene Barry and Ann Robinson star in the first movie adaptation of the classic HG Wells novel, with the Martians landing in Southern California rather than Surrey.

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14:35 King Solomon's Mines

(1985) Classic adventure. Allan Quatermain (Richard Chamberlain) is hired to find a woman's (Sharon Stone) father, who vanished while searching for the legendary diamond mines.

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16:40 Star Trek: The Motion Picture

(1979) In the first spin-off movie of the TV series, Kirk, Spock, McCoy and the crew of the Enterprise face a huge, destructive energy cloud which is heading for Earth to find its creator.

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19:15 Jumper

(2008) Sci-fi thriller. Hayden Christensen stars as a 'jumper' who can teleport anywhere but finds himself threatened by the Paladins, an organisation that tracks and kills his kind.

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21:00 The Descendants

(2011) Drama. George Clooney stars as a Hawaii-based lawyer whose life begins to unravel after his wife is involved in a waterskiing accident. With Shailene Woodley. Strong language.

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23:15 True Lies

(1994) Action comedy. A secret agent (Arnold Schwarzenegger) has hidden his job from his wife (Jamie Lee Curtis) for 15 years. But that's all about to change... Strong language/violence.

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02:00 Wrong Turn 2: Dead End

(2007) Gory horror sequel. A group of quiz-show contestants compete to survive in the wilderness. Unfortunately the wilderness is also home to cannibals. Strong language/graphic violence.

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08:55 River Cottage Christmas

Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall and the team serve up a festive menu with a twist, with wild boar, deer and goose, some luxury stocking fillers and canapés perfect for a cosy drinks party.

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10:00 River Cottage Bites

Bite-sized films from River Cottage showing how to create a range of culinary treats.

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10:10 SuperScrimpers

Mrs Moneypenny opens a cash clinic in an East Midlands garden centre, where she discusses pensions, utility bills, tax and lease car deals. And Harry Wallop checks out toothpaste best-buys.

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10:45 The Robe

(1953) Drama. Biblical epic starring Oscar-nominated Richard Burton as a Roman centurion who wins Jesus' robe at the Crucifixion and finds his prize changes his life.

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13:25 Time Team

Time Team travels to Sussex in an attempt to paint a picture of life - and death - in a medieval leper hospital. But this hospital was much more than a place of care: it was a community.

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14:30 Time Team

Tony Robinson and the Team search for a lost sacristy in Westminster Abbey. It's a dig complicated by centuries of later building work, and one that throws up major surprises.

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15:35 Come Dine with Me at Christmas

A delectable Christmas special, as four amateur chefs from York take turns to prepare and serve one dish of a four-course festive banquet to guests they've never met before.

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16:40 A Place in the Sun: Home or Away

Chris and Jackie are after the perfect holiday retreat, but will it be in South Hams, near Dartmouth, or on the south coast of France? Jonnie Irwin and Jasmine Harman help them decide.

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17:45 A Place in the Sun: Winter Sun

Jasmine Harman is in the Caribbean to help Kathy Hector search for a rental investment/holiday home in Antigua, where Kathy used to live.

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18:50 Heston's Fantastical Christmas

Heston Blumenthal makes the biggest Christmas pudding ever - one that's large enough to step inside. There's also pig's head, edible baubles and snow cocktails.

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19:55 Grand Designs

Can Tim and his wife Philomena transform the rusting and rotten hulk of an old lifeboat station in Tenby into a beautiful modern home with far-reaching views of the sea?

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21:00 New: Car S.O.S

Brand new series - Campervan Challenge: Tim and Fuzz head to Hartlepool, where they cheer up car enthusiast Brian by secretly restoring his cherished 1971 classic VW bay-window campervan.

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22:00 The Hoarder Next Door

In this Christmas edition of the show, therapist Stelios Kiosses helps Pauline clear her house of old Christmas tat so she can celebrate properly with her grandkids for the first time.

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23:00 The Perfect Penis

The penis is arguably the organ most central to a man's sense of self, and the quest for penile perfection has driven some men to extraordinary and dangerous extremes, as three men prove.

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00:05 8 Out of 10 Cats Christmas Special

Jimmy Carr hosts a Christmas special with team captains Jon Richardson and Sean Lock. Guests include Holly Willoughby, Henning Wehn, Alan Davies, Roisin Conaty, Nick Helm and Joe Wilkinson.

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01:10 Car S.O.S

Brand new series - Campervan Challenge: Tim and Fuzz head to Hartlepool, where they cheer up car enthusiast Brian by secretly restoring his cherished 1971 classic VW bay-window campervan.

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02:10 Homeland

Shalwar Kameez: Carrie ventures to create a delicate alliance, while Fara fails to recruit a key asset. Still reeling over events in Islamabad, Quinn zeroes in on a potential lead.

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03:20 SuperScrimpers

Mrs Moneypenny opens a cash clinic in an East Midlands garden centre, where she discusses pensions, utility bills, tax and lease car deals. And Harry Wallop checks out toothpaste best-buys.

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06:00 Rules of Engagement

Singing and Dancing: When Timmy joins an 'a cappella' group, he is keen to keep his new hobby a secret from Russell. Jeff and Audrey have an annoying new neighbour.

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06:25 Rules of Engagement

Jeff Day: When Jeff proclaims that it's 'Jeff Day', everything goes swimmingly until the cleaning lady arrives. Adam is baffled when his eye keeps twitching.

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06:50 One Tree Hill

Anyone Who Had a Heart: As Haley prepares to MC the annual Tree Hill Burning Boat Festival, Brooke uses the opportunity to ponder her father's betrayal.

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07:35 Happy Endings

The Kerkovich Way: Alex tries to convince Dave that they never spent the night together, asking Jane to help her out with an alibi, and confusing Brad in the process.

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08:00 Hollyoaks

Dodger is trapped in a Christmas nightmare, while Sienna is delighted to have her family by her side. Phoebe drops a bombshell on Robbie, and Nancy leans on Rick for the wrong kind of help.

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08:30 Suburgatory

Friendship Fish: George gets himself a Chatswin-style makeover from Dallas. But when his friends from New York come to visit, they ridicule his new lifestyle.

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09:00 Charmed

Morality Bites: Phoebe has a vision of herself being burnt to death at the stake. The sisters travel 10 years into the future to see what happened and encounter a modern-day witch hunt.

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10:00 Rules of Engagement

Surro-Gate: In the first episode of season five, Jeff and Audrey discover some surprising news about the surrogate mother they have chosen for their baby.

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10:30 Rules of Engagement

The Bank: Jeff reveals that he keeps a list of mistakes Audrey has made, which he calls 'the bank'. Russell sends a suggestive email to a colleague.

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11:00 How I Met Your Mother

Where Were We?: Ted's romantic luck is bolstered by his new relationship with Robin, who has yet to reveal her love of guns. However, Marshall is feeling down after his split from Lily.

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11:30 How I Met Your Mother

The Scorpion and the Toad: Marshall has a string of ill-fated nights out with Barney in a bid to meet new women. He eventually goes on a date, but bumps into Lily.

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12:00 Rude(ish) Tube

Rude Tube's naughty little sister finds some slightly less rude online videos, including Spider-Man playing basketball, Batman being pulled over by police and how not to dock an oil tanker.

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12:30 Rules of Engagement

The Young and the Restless: Audrey bets Jeff that he can't get a phone number from a younger woman, so dares him to go out without his wedding ring to try.

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13:00 How I Met Your Mother

Shelter Island: Stella's sister is jilted just before her wedding. Angry at the amount of money spent, Stella suggests she and Ted take over the wedding for themselves to save expenditure.

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13:30 How I Met Your Mother

Happily Ever After: Ted's friends are worried that he isn't facing up to his feelings about Stella when he hides from her in a restaurant, but later he manages to confront her.

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14:00 The Big Bang Theory

The Vacation Solution: Sheldon helps Amy in her biology lab after he is forced to use up two weeks of holiday, but he is bored by the tasks she gives him.

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14:30 The Big Bang Theory

The Rothman Disintegration: Sheldon and Kripke argue over who should get Professor Rothman's vacant corner office. Amy buys Penny some art to celebrate their friendship.

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15:00 Rules of Engagement

The Young and the Restless: Audrey bets Jeff that he can't get a phone number from a younger woman, so dares him to go out without his wedding ring to try.

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15:30 Rules of Engagement

Kids: Jennifer and Adam plan a romantic weekend together, while Jeff and Audrey think about having children, and Russell runs into one of his old flames.

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16:00 Rude(ish) Tube

This edition of Rude Tube's naughty little sister finds some slightly less rude (but still cheeky) videos, featuring the world's loudest burper, a guru with the giggles and a very fat cat.

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16:30 Suburgatory

Krampus: George arranges a Christmas trip to New York for Tessa and her mother. Ryan is distressed when he finds out that he's adopted. Dalia begs Carmen to come home.

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17:00 How I Met Your Mother

Shelter Island: Stella's sister is jilted just before her wedding. Angry at the amount of money spent, Stella suggests she and Ted take over the wedding for themselves to save expenditure.

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17:30 How I Met Your Mother

Happily Ever After: Ted's friends are worried that he isn't facing up to his feelings about Stella when he hides from her in a restaurant, but later he manages to confront her.

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18:00 The Big Bang Theory

The Werewolf Transformation: Sheldon's well-organised world is turned upside down when he learns that the barber who has cut his hair for years has passed away.

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18:30 The Big Bang Theory

The Weekend Vortex: Amy is upset when Sheldon breaks his promise to accompany her to her aunt's birthday party in order to join the guys for a video game marathon.

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19:00 Hollyoaks

Tegan offers Tony a shoulder to cry on but he ends up discovering a heart-breaking truth. John Paul and Lockie go on the run from the law and end up taking an unexpected journey.

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19:30 Rude(ish) Tube

Rude Tube's naughty little sister has discovered an incredible UFO sighting, a surfing cat and a man flying through a hole in a cave.

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20:00 The Big Bang Theory

The Tangerine Factor: When Penny breaks up with her boyfriend, Leonard plucks up the courage to ask her out. Both of them then ask Sheldon for advice about the date.

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20:30 The Big Bang Theory

The Bad Fish Paradigm: The first episode in series two of the US comedy about beauties and geeks. Penny opens up to a reluctant Sheldon after a less-than-stellar first date with Leonard.

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21:00 New: Made in Chelsea

Brand new series - It's Christmas in Chelsea and Spencer's relationship with Lauren is under the spotlight with fresh allegations of misbehaviour. Can Sam and Tiff salvage their friendship?

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22:00 Taking New York: Sneak Peek

Brand new: Will Best hangs out in the Big Apple to introduce the cast of E4's new 2015 reality series that follows the lives and loves of a group of British twenty-somethings in New York.

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22:35 The Big Bang Theory

The Middle Earth Paradigm: Penny decides to host a big Halloween party, putting Leonard, Sheldon, Howard and Raj through a demanding new test of their social skills.

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23:00 The Big Bang Theory

The Dumpling Paradox: When Howard seduces Penny's friend and spends the night with her in Penny's flat, Penny asks if she can sleep on Leonard and Sheldon's sofa.

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23:30 The Inbetweeners

Sparkling comedy about being a suburban teenager. Will (Simon Bird), whose parents have just divorced, is forced to move to a new area and change from private to comprehensive school.

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00:00 The IT Crowd

Yesterday's Jam: In the very first episode, new recruit Jen is appointed head of the IT department, but her staff Moss and Roy soon discover that she knows nothing about computers.

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00:35 Rude Tube

Brand new series - World Wide Weird: Alex Zane presents the top 50 of online oddities including the world's stupidest tattoo and the weirdest public information film ever made.

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01:40 Bad Robots

Brand new series - The robots are still wreaking havoc as visitors over at the world-famous clipper ship Cutty Sark learn some very questionable facts from the tourist information machine.

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02:10 How I Met Your Mother

No Pressure: Ted tells Robin that he loves her just as she is setting off on her trip to Russia. Barney makes a discovery about Marshall and Lily when he snoops on them.

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02:30 How I Met Your Mother

Karma: Barney thinks the way that Quinn is manipulating him is payback for the manner in which he has treated women in the past. Ted is still upset about Robin moving out.

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02:55 The Inbetweeners

Sparkling comedy about being a suburban teenager. Will (Simon Bird), whose parents have just divorced, is forced to move to a new area and change from private to comprehensive school.

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03:20 The IT Crowd

Yesterday's Jam: In the very first episode, new recruit Jen is appointed head of the IT department, but her staff Moss and Roy soon discover that she knows nothing about computers.

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4oD

03:45 One Tree Hill

Anyone Who Had a Heart: As Haley prepares to MC the annual Tree Hill Burning Boat Festival, Brooke uses the opportunity to ponder her father's betrayal.

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04:25 Charmed

Morality Bites: Phoebe has a vision of herself being burnt to death at the stake. The sisters travel 10 years into the future to see what happened and encounter a modern-day witch hunt.

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07:00 THE GREATEST XMAS SONGS OF ALL TIME!

With Santa's help, we're delivering the definitive Christmas soundtrack. These are the greatest Xmas songs of all time, especially for you.

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09:00 CHRISTMAS PIXIE'S TOP 50

Boys and Girls singer Pixie Lott counts down the 50 finest Christmas tracks of recent years.

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13:30 #VIDEOCRUSH DOES CHRISTMAS!

The UK's most opinionated YouTubers and music fans get their chance to let loose, reviewing some of the freshest videos around. Here they get the opportunity to have a look at some festive tracks.

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14:30 THE GREATEST XMAS SONGS OF ALL TIME!

With Santa's help, we're delivering the definitive Christmas soundtrack. These are the greatest Xmas songs of all time, especially for you.

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15:30 4MUSIC XMAS QUIZ!

Settle in for a while as we test your festive knowledge! Look out for the questions at the start of every track, and for us to reveal the answers at the end.

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16:30 LIZ KITTEN & DUNCAN BLUE'S CHRISTMAS REUNION TOP 50

Liz 'Crackers' McClarnon and Duncan 'Jingle-Bells' James get together to bring us 50 tracks from their perfect Christmas playlist.

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21:00 8 OUT OF 10 CATS CHRISTMAS SPECIAL

The topical comedy panel show returns for a cracking Christmas special hosted by Jimmy Carr, with team captains Jon Richardson and Sean Lock, plus guests Holly Willoughby, Henning Wehn, Alan Davies and Roisin Conaty.

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22:00 8 OUT OF 10 CATS UNCUT

Jimmy Carr hosts an extended edition of the comedy statistics quiz, with team captains Sean Lock and Jon Richardson and guests Amir Khan, Richard Ayoade, Holly Walsh and Josh Widdicombe.

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22:50 CARDINAL BURNS 3/6

Comedy from Seb Cardinal and Dustin Demri-Burns. Banksy's French pen pal Le Rat comes to stay, resulting in a brush with the law, and a do-gooding 80s rapper finds himself a bit out of place on the London grime scene.

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4oD

23:20 CARDINAL BURNS 4/6

Things get ugly when New Guy and Charlie train a gang of resident office geeks in the art of flirting, and Young Dreams' Rachel falls in love with a handsome tramp while volunteering at the homeless shelter.

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23:50 AIRPLANE VS VOLCANO

(2014) Action adventure starring former Superman Dean Cain, in which a commercial airliner becomes trapped inside a ring of erupting volcanoes. As well as the lava and explosions outside, mounting tensions and distrust inside the plane make for a disastrously bumpy ride. 4Music premiere.

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01:35 THE GREATEST XMAS SONGS OF ALL TIME!

With Santa's help, we're delivering the definitive Christmas soundtrack. These are the greatest Xmas songs of all time, especially for you.

3.00am CLOSE

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