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TV Listings
Saturday 25 May
06:10 The HoobsHooting: Something's keeping the Hoobs awake and if a Hoob can't sleep then a Hoob can't answer questions like 'What's all that hooting at night?'.
06:35 The HoobsSoft Round Flat Things: If a Hoob can't find their Hoobarama then a Hoob can't play Hoobarama. Is there anything soft, round and flat on the Peep planet that they can use instead?
07:00 British RallycrossHighlights from the Monster Energy MSA British Rallycross Championship 2013. The British Rallycross Championship heads north to Knockhill in Scotland for its third round.
07:25 Mobil 1 The GridJenson Button exclusively previews the Indy 500, and the show looks at the Le Mans-winning Audi R18 e-tron Quattro. Highlights come from the DTM's visit to Brands Hatch and Rally Corsica.
08:00 The Morning LineNick Luck, has all the news, features, latest betting and tips ahead of a busy day's racing at Haydock Park, Goodwood and York. Plus, a preview of next week's Derby and Oaks at Epsom.
09:00 Everybody Loves RaymondThank You Notes: Marie instantly tries to get the upper hand in her relationship with her new daughter-in-law when Amy and Robert return from their honeymoon.
09:30 Everybody Loves RaymondHome from School: When Michael stays home from school for two days in a row, Ray mistakenly suspects he simply has homework he hasn't finished.
10:00 FrasierThe Zoo Story: Bebe confronts Frasier at Cafe Nervosa, telling him she wants him back.
10:30 FrasierThe Maris Counselor: Niles, under the care of his and Maris's therapist, is convinced that their marriage can be saved - until a surprise rendezvous with his ice princess.
11:00 The Big Bang TheoryPilot: Leonard and Sheldon are brilliant physicists, but have no luck when it comes to understanding women. All this begins to change when lovely Penny moves next door.
11:35 The Big Bang TheoryThe Big Bran Hypothesis: Sheldon is bothered by how messy Penny's flat is and he sneaks in to clean and organise it, but when Penny finds out she isn't best pleased.
12:05 The SimpsonsSweet Seymour Skinner's Baadasssss Song: Bart gets Principal Skinner sacked and Flanders takes over at the school. Out of work, Skinner befriends his erstwhile nemesis Bart.
12:35 Heston's Fantastical FoodIn this edition, Heston transforms the ice cream van. He builds the world's biggest 99 Flake, and makes Cornetto, Feast and Calippo 'paint balls', which he fires from a special cannon.
13:40 Channel 4 RacingFrom Haydock Park, Goodwood and York. Presenter: Nick Luck. Reporter: Rishi Persad. Commentary and analysis: Richard Hoiles, Jim McGrath, Graham Cunningham and Tanya Stevenson.
16:10 Come Dine with MeFirst to host in Hastings is 42-year-old charity manager Andrew Batsford, who is hoping to inspire his guests with foraged ingredients of sea broccoli and stinging nettles.
16:40 Come Dine with MeIt's the second day of the competition in Hastings, and retired solicitor Adrian is hoping to impress his guests with a Moroccan-themed evening. But disaster strikes when his tagine burns.
17:10 Come Dine with MeIt's day three in Hastings and well-travelled former corporate wife Sally-Anne Keller hosts a German-themed evening with her guests required to dress, sing and dance accordingly.
17:40 Come Dine with MeGlamorous hairdresser Kate is laying on a 'gourmet' pub night for her guests in Hastings where she tells all about her 'rendezvous' with a very famous funny man.
18:15 Come Dine with MeConfident wheeler dealer Stelios Michael hopes to blow his guests away with an authentic Greek night on the final night in Hastings, including a master class in Greek dancing.
19:00 Titanic(1997) Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet star in James Cameron's Oscar-winning epic as lovers from across the social divide who meet on the doomed ocean liner.
22:40 48 HRS(1982) Comedy thriller. Nick Nolte stars as a tough cop, with Eddie Murphy as the wisecracking con who can help him to nail a murderer. Strong, offensive language/brutal violence.
00:30 Dylan Moran Live: Yeah, YeahAgeing, religion, kids and relationships intertwine with the general absurdities of life in the Black Books star's 2011 show. All delivered with Moran's renowned, shambolic charm.
01:25 SouthlandLet It Snow: In the third series of the police drama set in Los Angeles, detective Lydia Adams has a stressful adjustment period with her new partner.
02:10 Hollyoaks OmnibusCallum's actions have a devastating cost, Carmel is surprised by Jim's generosity, a heartbroken Martha makes a big promise, an old friend rushes to Sinead's aid and Ste has a cunning plan.
04:15 Deal or No DealNoel Edmonds asks the all-important question as contestants do battle with the Banker in their quest to leave the Dream Factory with £250,000.
05:10 CountdownNick Hewer and Rachel Riley host as contestants race against the clock to pit their wits against vowels, consonants and numbers. Janet Street-Porter is in Dictionary Corner.
05:55 SuperscrimpersBite-size portions from the series that shows how to scrimp and save in these straitened times. Mrs Moneypenny leads the way with enough money-saving tips to help everyone live for less.
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09:15 SuperscrimpersBite-size portions from the series that shows how to scrimp and save in these straitened times. Mrs Moneypenny leads the way with enough money-saving tips to help everyone live for less.
09:30 Come Dine with MeIn north Somerset, chatterbox Claire takes on David the artist, Graham the foodie and the glamorous Hayley. Can David's curious menu, which seems to include jacket potatoes and beans, win?
10:30 Come Dine with MeIn Kent, single mum Vanessa faces outspoken butcher Scott, joker John and personal trainer Annette, in a week of entertaining that includes a heated debate about Gordon Ramsay.
11:30 Sarah Beeny's Selling HousesSarah gives three Brighton homeowners one week, £1000 and lots of ideas on how to improve their homes. But which one of them will appeal to househunter Adele?
12:30 Sarah Beeny's Selling HousesThree competing vendors get the chance to check out the competition in Chelmsford, with Sarah Beeny giving them each £1000 and a week to make changes to tempt a potential buyer.
13:30 Come Dine with MeFirst to host in Warwickshire is 50-year-old sports-mad fitness instructor Liza Macias. Liza plans to woo her guests with a French menu and three well-oiled hunks.
14:00 Come Dine with MeIn Warwickshire sailor and ladies' man Steve hopes his nautical evening will win his four female guests over. But what will the ladies think of the secrets of Steve's love ship?
14:30 Come Dine with MeIt's day three of the competition in Warwickshire and admin manager Emma Reddin lays on pea and potato samosas, a selection of Indian curries and some Bollywood dancing.
15:00 Come Dine with MeIn Warwickshire it's the turn of PA Pinky Sidhu, who plans an evening of sophistication and pageantry in an effort to introduce her guests to the finer things in life.
15:30 Come Dine with MeEccentric driving instructor Alison Firth hopes to impress her guests with her 80s disco themed night that reaches a sticky climax with a marshmallow competition.
16:00 Heston's Fantastical FoodIn this edition, Heston transforms the ice cream van. He builds the world's biggest 99 Flake, and makes Cornetto, Feast and Calippo 'paint balls', which he fires from a special cannon.
17:00 Four RoomsWill any of the dealers be tempted by rare and personal Kate Bush memorabilia, two beautiful wooden swans or a wallet said to have belonged to Oliver Cromwell?
18:00 Four RoomsCan any of the members of the public secure life-changing sums of money in return for a Star Wars script, an armistice message from World War I or a rare pistol from the Titanic?
19:00 Four RoomsMembers of the public attempt to secure significant sums of money in return for one of the first flushing public toilets, a mannequin lamp, and a Miro painting or the Queen... in stone.
20:00 Come Dine with MeFour passionate cooks from Surrey battle it out in a week of top-quality cooking, and eccentric table talk of 'death rooms' and aristocracy.
21:00 999: What's Your Emergency?There is one night when everyone's up for a party: payday. For the call operators at Blackpool's emergency control centres hearing about our payday excesses is a weekly occurrence.
22:00 24 Hours in A&EThe series that goes behind the scenes at King's College Hospital takes a moving - and sometimes light-hearted - look at when boys become men, and passing the baton between the generations.
00:05 Alan Carr: Chatty ManAlan Carr's guests include Zach Galifianakis, Ken Jeong and Ed Helms who talk about The Hangover Part III, Ex-Corrie star Helen Flanagan and Stephen Graham, with music from Olly Murs.
01:05 Grand DesignsKevin McCloud revisits Alan and Judith, who in 2009 began building a prototype prefab home in Cumbria. Was Alan able to create a unique place to live and also save his steel business?
02:05 George Clarke's Amazing SpacesGeorge meets Ruth Tidd, who is attempting to turn an old caravan that was once used as a chicken home into an ice cream parlour, then travels to Barcelona to look at a tiny studio flat.
03:00 SuperscrimpersIn York, Mrs Moneypenny provides advice on everything from home improvement to pensions for self-employed people, and Harry Wallop finds out if value deodorants are not to be sniffed at.
03:55 Come Dine with MeFour passionate cooks from Surrey battle it out in a week of top-quality cooking, and eccentric table talk of 'death rooms' and aristocracy.
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11:00 The Three Worlds of Gulliver(1960) Skilful and charming adaptation of Jonathan Swift's classic satire Gulliver's Travels, focusing on his adventures with the little people and the giants. Effects by Ray Harryhausen.
13:00 Just My Luck(2006) Romcom. Lindsay Lohan and Chris Pine star as a lucky girl and a sad loser whose fortunes are reversed after a chance kiss, which unexpectedly throws them into each other's arms.
15:00 The Seventh Voyage of Sinbad(1958) Fantasy adventure. When Sinbad's fiancée is shrunk by an evil magician, he must overcome a series of daunting adversaries and obstacles to restore her. Effects by Ray Harryhausen.
16:45 Home Alone 3(1997) Raja Gosnell directs this third film in the comedy series, with Alex D Linz as the resourceful boy who is stranded at home with chickenpox when a top secret microchip comes his way.
18:40 Mission: Impossible II(2000) John Woo's action thriller stars Tom Cruise as superspy Ethan Hunt, who is tasked with retrieving a genetically modified disease from a group of terrorists. Some violent scenes.
21:00 Forrest Gump(1994) Oscar-winner Tom Hanks is the simple Gump, who's present at the world's great events, from Watergate to Vietnam, without ever quite realising it... Violence/offensive language.
23:40 The Crazies(2010) Gory horror with Timothy Olyphant, Joe Anderson and Radha Mitchell. Something mysterious turns the residents of a lone farming community into homicidal maniacs.
01:35 The Host(2006) Korean monster horror in which a mutant kidnaps the daughter of a fast-food stand owner. The authorities refuse to help, so the father and his family attempt a rescue operation.
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08:55 Time TeamPoole Harbour was a thriving port in the Iron Age, but could Green Island, in the centre of the harbour, have also been a site of early industrial mass production?
10:00 Time TeamA quiet rural valley in Staffordshire was once home to a mass of blacksmiths' furnaces, but do they date back even further than the Elizabethan age?
11:05 Time TeamAs the beach of the Severn River erodes, it reveals astonishing evidence of some of this country's earliest inhabitants. Tony Robinson and the Team investigate.
12:10 Time TeamThe Iron Age hill fort in Wittenham, Oxfordshire, is an impressive monument but it is dwarfed by a larger hill nearby. Time Team are intrigued; how was it used in the Iron Age?
13:15 The Ladykillers(1955) Alec Guinness and Peter Sellers star in this classic Ealing comedy as gang members whose perfect crime looks as though it will be scuppered by their little old landlady.
15:05 River Cottage BitesRiver Cottage head chef Gill Meller shows how to make the most of left-over home-made bread, from the tasty Italian bread salad panzanella to the Christmas classic, bread sauce.
15:10 A Place in the SunAmanda Lamb takes the Hoburn family from Whitley Bay to the Greek island of Crete. They plan a permanent move, but will it be to their dream stone cottage or will they go for an apartment?
15:45 Location, Location, LocationKirstie Allsopp and Phil Spencer revisit two sets of first-time buyers, Isobel Phillips and Chris Martin in the Cotswolds, and student Claire Winshipp on London's Southbank.
16:50 Location, Location, LocationKirstie and Phil catch up with Rik and Helen in Manchester, and Alison and Phil in Herefordshire. Did Rik and Helen find a family home, and did Alison and Phil's big move work out?
17:50 Location, Location, LocationKirstie Allsopp and Phil Spencer face a challenge that's all about postcodes and pickiness. They help a couple search for their first home in Pinner; and two new parents are set on Hitchin.
18:55 Time TeamThe Team visit Dorset farmer Simon Meadon's land, which is packed with archaeology, including a large Roman building, which might be a villa, and a number of burials.
20:00 The Aristocrats: The RothschildsBrand new: With unique access, this film meets the enormously wealthy and usually enormously private Rothschilds, an 'aristocratic' family very different from most others.
21:00 Turtle Boy: A Bodyshock SpecialThe extraordinary story of Didier, a six-year-old boy from Colombia with a giant mole that covered 40% of his body: a story of childhood bravery, cutting-edge medicine and a mother's love.
22:00 Hero(2002) Jet Li stars in this action-adventure as an assassin in ancient China who claims to have killed the king's three deadliest enemies. Is he telling the truth? In Mandarin/subs.
00:05 Time TeamThe Team visit Dorset farmer Simon Meadon's land, which is packed with archaeology, including a large Roman building, which might be a villa, and a number of burials.
01:05 The Aristocrats: The RothschildsBrand new: With unique access, this film meets the enormously wealthy and usually enormously private Rothschilds, an 'aristocratic' family very different from most others.
02:10 Turtle Boy: A Bodyshock SpecialThe extraordinary story of Didier, a six-year-old boy from Colombia with a giant mole that covered 40% of his body: a story of childhood bravery, cutting-edge medicine and a mother's love.
03:15 A Place in the SunA pair of house-hunters want a holiday home in a busy resort on the Algarve, but will their indecisiveness stop them from achieving their long-held dream? Not if Amanda Lamb has her way.
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06:00 HeartlandCatch and Release: While the boys head off on an enjoyable fishing trip, the girls are left to deal with the havoc caused by a dog, a porcupine and a herd of escaped cows.
06:45 GreekA Tale of Two Parties: Omega Chi and Kappa Tau throw competing parties to celebrate the removal of the restictions on partying.
07:35 Jo Frost: Extreme Parental......Guidance: Jo Frost meets six-year-old Madison, who suffers from furious tantrums, and five-year-old Layla, who has never slept a night in her own bed.
08:35 Make It or Break ItFriends Close, Enemies Closer: The girls are photographed for a magazine. Later, Kaylie visits Carter to ask for another chance with him. Will she get one?
09:35 Ugly BettySecretaries Day: Betty struggles to come up with the cash to solve the latest Suarez family dilemma, all the while planning Mode's big assistants' week bash at a medieval-themed restaurant.
10:35 ScrubsOur Driving Issues: Cole and Dr Kelso learn the hard way that their inflated egos are standing in the way of their friendships.
11:05 ScrubsOur Thanks: In the series nine finale, Cole identifies his true calling in surgery, Drew finds the love of his life and Lucy gets the inspiration to become a doctor.
11:35 ScrubsPilot: With his pre-med behind him, it's John 'JD' Dorian's first day as a medical intern at the busy Sacred Heart Hospital. But his new colleagues are more challenging than he imagined.
12:05 GleeDream On: Will's high school nemesis Bryan Ryan (Neil Patrick Harris) wreaks havoc on the Glee Club. Meanwhile, Artie, Tina and Rachel face up to their problems.
13:00 CharmedWomb Raider: The Seer is plotting to steal Phoebe's unborn child and raise it to become the next Source so that the throne of the underworld can never be passed on to another demon.
14:00 Made in ChelseaBrand new series - It's games in the garden, country dancing and bunting ahoy as Binky and her mum host a barn dance, but what drama will unfold in the country?
15:00 Rules of EngagementA Visit from Fay: Jennifer discovers some alarming things about Adam's mum. Jeff and Audrey are forced to entertain themselves when their TV stops working.
15:30 Rules of EngagementTime Share: Adam and Jennifer agree to go away with Jeff and Audrey, even though they must sit through a timeshare sales pitch in order to get a deal on the trip.
16:00 Rules of EngagementJen at Work: Adam and Jennifer realise that living and working together is harder than they anticipated when he hires her to do some freelance work for his company.
16:30 Rules of EngagementOptimal Male: Jeff struggles to lose enough weight to be eligible for the 'optimal male' category of fitness in his life insurance exam.
17:00 Rules of EngagementRussell's Father's Son: Adam is worried that Russell will be upset when he discovers that Russell's father asked Adam to pose as his son in a promotional video.
17:30 The Mindy ProjectBrand new series - Josh and Mindy's Christmas Party: Mindy hosts the office Christmas party at her flat, but the event is ruined when she stumbles upon a secret that Josh has been keeping.
18:00 The Big Bang TheoryThe Desperation Emanation: Leonard realises he's the only one of the gang without a girlfriend, while Sheldon wants to get rid of his when she hatches a plan for him to meet her mother.
18:30 The Big Bang TheoryThe Irish Pub Formulation: A visit from Raj's sister Priya creates tension among the guys, especially when Leonard asks Sheldon to conceal his romantic past with her.
19:00 Happy EndingsMeet the Parrots: Dave is not pleased to discover that his father's new love interest is actually Penny's mother. Alex is feeling lonely, so she buys a parrot for company.
19:30 How I Met Your MotherThe Leap: Ted has a career epiphany, Barney prepares to tell Robin how he feels about her, and Marshall considers leaping from his building to the neighbour's roof.
20:00 How I Met Your MotherBrand new series - The Ashtray: When Ted receives an unexpected voicemail message from his former love rival The Captain, the gang recall their last awkward encounter with him.
20:30 2 Broke GirlsBrand new series - And the Broken Hip: When a street performer sets up his puppet show in front of their cupcake shop, Max and Caroline fret that he will alienate their hip young customers.
21:00 Daredevil(2003) Superhero fantasy. Ben Affleck is a blind lawyer who turns vigilante by night. Jennifer Garner is his lover and Colin Farrell is the villain who endangers them both. Brutal violence.
23:05 The Big Bang TheoryThe Desperation Emanation: Leonard realises he's the only one of the gang without a girlfriend, while Sheldon wants to get rid of his when she hatches a plan for him to meet her mother.
23:35 The Big Bang TheoryThe Irish Pub Formulation: A visit from Raj's sister Priya creates tension among the guys, especially when Leonard asks Sheldon to conceal his romantic past with her.
00:05 The Cleveland ShowBrand new series - Of Lice and Men: After an outbreak of headlice at school, Rallo is forced to cut off his beloved Afro, but when his classmates make fun of him, Cleveland Junior steps in.
00:35 Rude Tube 2012Alex Zane presents the internet's biggest stars who are battling it out for the 2012 number one spot with 50 new clips alongside the best 50 from the previous series.
02:35 Happy EndingsMeet the Parrots: Dave is not pleased to discover that his father's new love interest is actually Penny's mother. Alex is feeling lonely, so she buys a parrot for company.
02:55 The Ricky Gervais ShowStephen recounts his night out at a London club and Karl writes a poem about a bothersome person he once met in hospital.
03:25 The Ricky Gervais ShowIn this instalment, Ricky reads some predictions for the future and Karl shares his theories on them.
03:50 GreekA Tale of Two Parties: Omega Chi and Kappa Tau throw competing parties to celebrate the removal of the restictions on partying.
04:35 HeartlandCatch and Release: While the boys head off on an enjoyable fishing trip, the girls are left to deal with the havoc caused by a dog, a porcupine and a herd of escaped cows.
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07:30 THIS WEEK'S FRESH MUSIC TOP 20
Miquita Oliver counts down 4Music's pick of the 20 biggest tracks of the week, featuring the latest videos from the hottest new artists.
09:20 UKHOT40: THE TOP 20
Find out the UK's new official number one as Will Best counts down the 20 biggest tracks of the week!
11:15 HUGE SATURDAY CHART HITS!
It's Saturday and the weekend has truly begun, so stick with us for some huge chart hits. We have nothing but the biggest music videos!
13:00 THE BIG BEATS DANCE CHART TOP 20
It's all about the dance scene right now! Join us as we count down the 20 biggest dance tracks from the hottest artists making waves in the UK.
14:45 UKHOT40: THE TOP 20
Find out the UK's new official number one as Will Best counts down the 20 biggest tracks of the week!
16:45 THE SATURDAY WARM UP! TOP 30
Going out or staying in... here's the music to get you in the mood for the weekend. We've got the top 30 tracks for your Saturday night!
19:15 UKHOT40: THE TOP 20
Find out the UK's new official number one as Will Best counts down the 20 biggest tracks of the week!
21:15 HOT GIRLS FIRING 50!
DJ Big Ted cranks the volume up and counts down the 50 fabulous females who know how to bring the party! Expect tunes from RiRi, Tulisa and Nicole Scherzinger.
01:30 20 BIG TUNES FOR SATURDAY NIGHT!
Kick off Saturday night with 20 big tunes that will get you ready for a great weekend!
03:00 THIS WEEK'S HOTTEST NEW VIDS!
Stick with 4Music for a late-night playlist of the hottest new videos of the week.
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