Testing My Greatest Fear
When I was invited to take part in Superhuman it sounded like a
fascinating programme and immediately I agreed to it. Whilst completing
the application form one of the questions was what is your greatest
fear? And, being an honest person, I wrote the answer - heights.
It was only after I had sent off the form that I realised that
they would probably design a test to make us face our greatest fears.
How right I was! (I subsequently found out that many of the other
contestants left that section blank or didn't tell the truth!).
The day arrived when we were put through our first test. A taxi
arrived to take us to the location. Secrecy was the order of the
day and, once in the building, we were immediately taken to a small
room beforel being briefed about the test. I had no idea what to
expect. We were wearing sports gear and trainers yet I didn't know
if the test would be of a physical nature and whether it would be
wise to eat anything or not. Everyone was speculating about what
the test could be but rather than get involved in debating about
possibilities, I took myself off to the corner of the room and focused
on doing some work to avoid the tension.
Eventually, we were informed it was going to be fearlessness. I
immediately sensed that it would be something to do with heights.
My heart sank. The scientist then told us that we would be wearing
heart monitors and it would depend on how relaxed we were whether
we would have to face a 150ft bungee jump or not. The person who
used up 500 heartbeats first would have to jump. The only saving
grace was that there was a one in two chance of having to do it.
I felt a little more relieved.
They took us to an enormous hall which was dimly lit and had dry
ice billowing round the area where we would land. This was all designed
to get our hearts racing I thought to myself.
The final straw came when we were told who we would be competing
against. I was to face my worst nightmare in that my partner in
this competition was to be Wesley, who is used to scaling ladders
to rescue people from burning buildings! Out of all the contestants
he was the only person that seemed so confident about heights.
Faced with all these challenges, I had to prepare a strategy that
would give me a chance of beating Wes. I decided to think about
the test in two parts. The first part being the time when our hearts
were being monitored and the second being the bungee jump itself.
I decided only to focus on addressing the first part. If my strategy
failed then I wouldn't have time to think about the second part
- it would just happen! Having been in stressful situations before,
I knew that visualisation is a useful technique to use to try and
keep relaxed. This involves focusing on a situation and trying to
imagine that you are actually there using your senses of smell,
sight, and hearing. If you can completely take yourself away to
your own relaxing world, then it can work. You often see athletes
performing this process before the start of a race.
The visualise standing in front of a small cottage in a remote
part of Scotland. I know this cottage well and can easily picture
being there, with its red door and flowers in front of it. The sun
is shining down, and there is no noise apart from a small stream
gurgling by in front of the door. Imagining this place makes me
feel peaceful, relaxed and at one with nature.
As a corporate training specialist I often encourage my clients to
use visualisation but must admit that I had never really tried the
technique in an extremely stressful environment. It's easy to do
it in a comfortable training room, but a different matter when you
are standing on a platform 150 feet up with a thick rope attached
to your ankles!
It was scary even just getting onto the platform itself. It involved
being hoisted up outside in a cherry picker and then climbing up
to the platform via steps that had gaps in so you could see the ground
below. My heart was in my mouth knowing that in a few minutes I would
have to control my nerves.
When I eventually reached the gantry having gingerly taken each
step towards it, my focus completely changed. It became just like
a race and this was the start line. One of the safety staff suggested
that it was helpful to look down and take in the height rather than
be afraid to do it. So I took a deep breath and looked down. Everything
seemed tiny below but my mind was telling me this is okay you are
safe and you will be calm.
I fixed the relaxing image in my mind and tightly shut my eyes.
This helped because I was then able to focus more clearly on the
scene in my mind. We were miked up and I could hear in my ear the
commentary from the presenter and the beats from the heart monitor.
It was a surreal situation.
Eventually the test began. My only attention was on the scene in
my mind. How clearly could I visualise that cottage and how strongly
could I hear the stream? Occasionally my peripheral senses picked
up the commentary but I was determined to remain relaxed and focused
on the scene with my eyes tightly shut.
The time seemed to last an eternity. I began to hear the presenter
saying that Wesley's heart was going faster than mine. I continued
to try and maintain concentration and stay relaxed. The pace of
the heartbeats was increasing in my ear until eventually I heard
Wesley being released and the sound of him dropping through the
air. There was still no let up as I had to remain relaxed for as
long as possible. Eventually I heard a voice tell me that I could
stop as my heartbeats had finished. It was the longest four minutes
of my life.
I breathed a sigh of relief it was all over. I felt fantastic having
not only conquered my fear of heights but also having beaten one
of the people who would have appeared a certainty to win this event.
I began to look forward to the next test...
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