 |
||||
         
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
||||
 |
When the woman in the clip tells me the first bits of information about the car, I see that her pattern is to stare right into my eyes and to tense up her facial muscles a little. Then, suddenly, her eyes go all over the place as she has to think up a lie. You can see that she looks away to think of something, breaking her pattern, then looks back at me to mentally tell me the information. Then she looks away again, unsure of herself, as if she wants to see if she can make the lie any more convincing. This was an easy one – she's a terrible liar! But notice that you have been able to tell that someone is lying without even hearing what they are saying. Not bad.
|
|||
|
This one's far more difficult. This salesman, asked to come up with a number of things in his life, can think very quickly on his feet and has no problem coming up with answers. But watch the eye movements – the first sign of a pattern I would look for. As he begins to describe some things about his life, you'll see (just as we cut to him) that his eyes look up briefly – which is what I'd expect. Then, when he describes the skiing scenario, he does not look up for the information in his mind first. That suggests a potential pattern break. When he starts talking about a third thing – sure enough, his eyes flick up as they did on the first one. The skiing scenario – the second situation he described – was the odd one out and therefore the lie. Of course, had he made the same movement on the third as on the second, that would have made the first description the odd one out. Got it? In addition, on that second answer he moves his eyes briefly, but in a different way. He also glances down, which is a classic sign of checking one's feelings – in other words, a possible signal of guilt. |
|||
|
This one about the first kiss is a little different, but once again the eye movements give it away. With the other situations, the content of what I asked and the response was not important: it was the process of the individuals trying to respond that gave away the lie. This time, questions themselves are important. Watch the clip a couple of times. See how his eyes move when he has to retrieve the information. The first thing I ask him for demands some thought on his part. It isn't easy for him to remember immediately how old he was. But note the time it takes him to find the answer in his mind. Now, I know he is picturing the scene of his first kiss because of that eye movement and the nature of the question. So I imagine myself in his mind, picturing the same scene. Whereas his mental picture wouldn't tell me how old he might have been when he first kissed a girl, if it were me who had been kissed, I should certainly be able to come up with the colour of her hair very quickly. Watch what he does. He moves his eyes in the same direction to retrieve the information. He isn't planning on lying, not like my other two 'victims'. But he holds the look for an extra beat before giving me the answer. Why? I know that he should be able to see the girl's hair colour very easily. Is it a difficult colour to describe? Is that why he has to take an extra moment? No, for he describes it in one word: 'Brunette.' He must have seen her hair in his mind, mentally named it as blonde, then decided to lie and change it to brunette. It all happened in a second, but we could see his thought processes clearly. Not only can we tell when people lie, but exactly how they lie. How did I know her real hair colour was blonde? Well, it was simply a likely guess. After all, I'm not psychic. |
|||
|
 Now, there is no single foolproof way of telling when someone is lying, but there are various things to look out for. Classic signs of lying include bringing the hand up to the face – for example, to stroke the chin or touching the nose. The speaker makes these movements almost as if he wants to 'hide' the words coming out of his mouth. You should also look out for eye movements. Generally, if people are thinking of visual information to answer a question, their eyes will move up: this is how they retrieve mental pictures. They do this unconsciously, but they will also tend to do it reliably. Once you know that, you can look for the instance when they don't look up in the same way, or when they look up but perhaps to the other side, or when they maintain eye contact with you when they would normally do otherwise. This last is an interesting point. Most people imagine that we maintain eye contact when we tell the truth and break it when we lie. Not so. The majority of people will maintain eye contact when lying, because they don't need to retrieve information from their minds and, therefore, don't need to move their eyes. At another level, they are eager to appear sincere, and so consciously decide to keep looking at you. But the point is not that such-and-such behaviour means a lie. The secret is to watch people closely and, keeping your wits about you, follow their mental processes in your own mind. Look for their patterns and see where they fall down. Watch for an answer that breaks the rules – the odd one out will be the lie. Now you know how this works, go out and try it with friends and family. Challenging them to lie convincingly, watch for eye movements and patterns. The more you practise this, the better you'll get. If you really want to drive yourself insane, start noticing your own patterns and eye movements. Just don't try chewing food at the same time! |
|||
In the video clips that follow, I ask some second-hand car dealers to tell me a few bits of information and then challenge them to lie convincingly with one of the bits. You will see that, despite the dealers' best attempts, I can always tell when they're lying – a very useful skill! Below I tell you how you can do it, too.
