On the surface, Groundskeeper Willie is a surly, gruff, hot- tempered sort of a fella, and what you see is what you get.
As far as this shaggy-haired, thickly- accented Scotsman is concerned, manners are for bath-taking, underpants-wearing lily-huggers.
Willie would rather wrestle a wild Alaskan timber wolf than sit down to a high tea. At the faintest sign of trouble, Willie rips off his shirt and hurls his rippling muscular body into the fray.
Crediting his remarkable build in part to his diet, Willie vigorously promotes the eating of haggis: 'Chopped heart and lungs, boiled in a wee sheep's stomach! Tastes as good as it sounds! Good for what ails ye!'
While Willie regards Principal Skinner as nothing more than a 'silk-wearin' croquet-playin' buttercup,' he takes pride in performing the tasks Skinner sets for him. In addition to his regular groundskeeping at Springfield Elementary, these include chasing stray dogs through the air vents, watering down the orange drink for extra profits at school functions, and substitute- teaching French class in his own sensitive way: 'Bonjour, you cheese-eatin' surrender-monkeys.'
Willie's personal life is as rocky and desolate as his native land. While it is true that he was once engaged to a magical British nanny, she dumped him immediately when her eyesight returned. Since then, he has spent the bulk of his private time secretly videotaping couples in their cars and pestering the female teachers at Springfield Elementary for a second date.
However, his poor success with the ladies has not kept Willie from a rich and rewarding emotional life. He has named his shovel 'Agnes' and is even more attached to his tractor, often cooing, 'Ach, my beauty! Were it not a violation of God's law, I'd make you me wife.'
