Judge ‘broadsheet’ manager Hodgson on results

Scarcely an hour into his tenure, this cosmopolitan coach, who has led 16 teams in eight countries, was grilled about his brief spell as a young player in South Africa during the apartheid era.

The next morning he awoke to find his speech impediment being ridiculed in the most crass way imaginable by a national newspaper which has taken great pleasure in treating successive England managers with all the sensitivity of Simpsons school bully Nelson Muntz. “You can’t pronounce your Rs… har, har.”

Happily, though, it appears to have galvanised support for the new boss from a nation which had been fully expecting Harry Redknapp to get the job.

Logical choice

However, a glance at the respective CVs of the two men suggests that, although it may seem a surprise choice, the elevation of Hodgson to the biggest job in English football is in fact an entirely logical one.

Since when was bonhomie and quick wit the preprequisite for an international coach? If it is, let’s employ Harry Hill.

For the first time ever, England have a boss who brings previous international management experience to the table, having led Switzerland, Finland and the United Arab Emirates. He took the previously underperforming Swiss into the last 16 of the 1994 World Cup and then to qualification for Euro 96. In a varied 36-year career, he has also won eight European league titles.

Compare and contrast with Redknapp, whose managerial map encompasses London and the south coast and whose only major silverware was the FA Cup in 2008 with Portsmouth, a club which has since gone into administration twice.

Admittedly, the circumspect and cerebral Hodgson appears to lack the jovial bonhomie and spontaneous quick wit of the current Spurs boss. But since when was that the prerequisite for a successful international coach? If it was, why stop at Harry Redknapp? Let’s employ Harry Hill and be done with it.

Military precision

Unfortunately, what Hodgson also lacks is time. On 6 June England fly to their base in Krakow for Euro 2012, giving him mere weeks to assess players, select a squad and oversee friendly matches against Norway in Oslo and Belgium at Wembley.

You can guarantee, though, that not a second will be wasted by this most meticulous of coaches. Hodgson generally employs a 4-4-2 formation with discipline at its heart; every player will be drilled methodically in training and expected to understand and execute his role with military precision.

England go into a major tournament this summer with perhaps the lowest expectations of any that have ever worn the three lions.

As befits a former Inter Milan manager, the emphasis will be on defending first and foremost. Hodgson is not the type to try and beat Spain or Germany at their own game.

If that doesn’t sound particularly edifying, well, tough. It might just represent the best chance of success for an England side who will go into a major tournament with perhaps the lowest expectations of any that have ever worn the three lions.

The unusual circumstances decree that it will have to be a work in progress for England – let’s take stock first and work on style later. After all, it worked for Greece in Euro 2004, and no-one in Athens reacted to that unexpected triumph by grumbling about the tactics.

Broadsheet man

Ultimately, though, Hodgson understands perfectly well that he will be judged on results, and that only decent ones will turn him into a media darling.

The Daily Telegraph’s Henry Winter astutely described him as “a broadsheet man in a tabloid world”, and so it is unlikely that England’s 13th full-time manager will have paid much attention to the Sun’s despicable headline.

You’re more likely to find his nose inside the pages of novels by American writers like Saul Bellow or Philip Roth. Might I recommend, though, that when Hodgson packs his bag for Poland and Ukraine next month, he takes a copy of Bellow’s Seize The Day rather than Roth’s The Humbling.

Follow John Anderson on Twitter: @GreatFaceRadio. An updated version of his book A Great Face For Radio is published in the autumn