Boom! There we were...

Last night, Slashmusic saw the best new band in Britain play live.
So now you're thinking, who can that be? You're thinking we're going to harp on about Love Bites again, aren't you? Well you'd be wrong.

As of last night, the best new band in Britain is Double G And The Traitorous 3. Only that's not their real name. And they're not technically new.

Confused?

See, the band we went to see play a secret pseudonymous gig in Kilburn's Luminaire (the best gig venue in London, btw) were, in actual fact, the legendary Scritti Politti!

Since the group haven't performed live since 1980 (due to stage jitters), and feature an entirely new lineup that singer Green Gartside recruited from his local boozer, and they didn't play any of the old hits like 'Wood Beez', 'The Sweetest Girl' or even 'Skank Bloc Bologna', but instead gave us a tiny glimpse into their incredible new album, to be released on Rough Trade later this year, we think we can count them as a new band.

Green has always been a pop genius, in our opinion, but the new stuff will have you grinning like a drugged baboon - it's that good. From our scribbled notes we can make out that one song is called 'E11th Nuts' and features a line about monkeys and women in negligees, another is called 'After Six' which contains the soon-to-be-t-shirt-slogan "Jesus keep your love away from me" and another is our favourite 'Boom Boom Bap', which is so drenched in heavenly pop sweetness it would make a choir of angels sound like the cast of 'Eastenders' having a shouting competition. Then our notes fell in some beer and a man danced on them. We didn't mind.

Welcome back Scritti Politti - the best new old band in Britain.


» Posted by: Tim
»Talk on boards

The Feeling's mutual

Yesterday we were still racked with guilt about mistaking The Feeling's truly beautiful new single 'Sewn' for anything less than a copper-bottomed, 21-gun-salute masterpiece. Sure, we'd apologised but not in person.

So we went over to the rather decadent Paradise By Way Of Kensal Green pub where somebody had told us The Feeling were hanging out, as far as we knew, waiting to duff our heads in for doubting their majesty. But, whatever the risk, we had to make our peace.

Happily, the boys were completely understanding about the whole matter.
"I think it is a grower," admitted bass player Richard, referring to our review of the single where we foolishly suggested it wasn't quite as good as their last one. "We weren't sure about it ourselves."

Of course, we pointed out, we think it's brilliant now.

"As soon as the penny drops, it's like [sings] 'Na, na, na, na!' added very tall drummer Paul. "You can't get it out of your head." Then singer Dan piped in with "We think, bugger it. If it needs to be re-released then so be it."

And we all shook hands and agreed to say no more about it. Over a pint we got to chatting about how The Feeling came to be and how their beautifully crafted, AOR-flecked, pop fitted in a world that was distinctly Arctic Monkey-shaped at the moment.

"We'd never try to be trendy," said the rather dapper Paul, "We're too old and our jeans aren't skinny enough. But that's quite liberating, in a way. We've been compared to lots of our favourite bands but none of those influences are deliberate. I guess that stuff just goes in and squirts itself out."

He asked us not to print that last bit.


Sorry.


Again.


» Posted by: Tim
»Talk on boards

When snap judgements go bad...

Last week we were a bit rude about The Feeling. Well, it had been a long day and we were all a bit emotional.

Anyway, since then, and after many, many listens to their uh-mayzing album, 'Twelve Stops And Home' we've come to the conclusion that they're actually the best band in the whole world and far from 'Sewn' not being as good as 'Fill My Little World', it's actually better.

While, 'Never Be Lonely' is even better than that. Oh blimey, etc.

Next week, in an attempt to right more wrongs, we will sit down with a plumbline and a set-square and reassess the worth of The Darkness*.

» Posted by: Rob
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*Except they can piss off.

Similou to what?

January wasn't kind to the Slashmusic team. We found ourselves wading through our postbags just desperate to find something new we could really love and all we found was Richard Ashcroft and Daniel O'Donnell. Oh, and misery-stick queen Beth Orton. Great!

Anyway, just as we were all ready to hack our own ears off, salvation arrived in the form of the very amazing ‘All This Love’, the debut single from The Similou.

But who, we asked, are this lot? We can tell you this:

WOW! The Similou are Jesse and Dizzy, a duo hailing from "the rough end of Gothenburg" - currently the electro-pop capitol of the world.

WOW! ‘All This Love’ is a glorious slab of fruity and frothy dance-funk that celebrates itself with one of the juiciest, hookiest choruses we’ve heard in bloody years.

WOW! They claim that discovering The Keytar changed their lives.

WOW! Like all great pop bands, they have a svengali figure known as The Mastermind, a local bartender who ‘fooled’ them into becoming The Similou. Wooh, spooky!

WOW! Jesse and Dizzy describe their music as a mix of "beatronica, discopop, synthpunk and queermetal!" This will surely make it one of the more difficult albums to locate in HMV.

Etc! Future tracks promise elements of Ghostbusters, Hall & Oates and Van Halen. 2006 suddenly looks very good indeed.

Remember where you sort of read about it first and stuff...

» Posted by: Mark
»Talk on boards

Wigwam Bam!

How was your weekend?

Ours was great. We went to Soho on Saturday to watch WigWam AKA Betty Boo and Alex James film the first video for their new single 'WigWam'. Alex looked splendid in ripped denim and lashings of makeup.

But can Betty still do the do?

Yes she can.

She looked fantastic on what was really her first official day of not being Alison Clarkson anymore... again.

"Now I've got the bob haircut, I really feel like Betty Boo," she told us. And she actually did tell us - to our faces. We're not just stealing a quote from a press release and passing it off as an exclusive like other people do.

And as we watched her totter about precariously atop a roof as people dressed as cats leapt about and director Dom Joly did his thing, several ordinary members of the public came up to us and asked what was going on.

"It's Betty Boo, on a roof," we replied. "She's back."

And, rather wonderfully, the ordinary members of the public seemed as excited about that fact as we are. So excited that we're going to tell you a Betty-Boo's-new-band-related joke:

Man: "Doctor, sometimes I'm a wigwam, then other times I'm a teepee."
Doctor: "The problem is, you're two tents." (Too tense - see? Hmm, maybe it works better if you say it out loud.)

More news as it happens! Hurrah!

» Posted by: Tim
»Talk on boards

X marks the tops

A few weeks ago we heard an album that made our ears get all swollen and our hearts get rather sweaty. That album was ‘Flock’ by BellX1, one of the bands we were already in a red-faced furore over for the ’06.

And just last night we were treated to the pleasure of a nice night out see the Irish gents play a warm-up gig in the rather snug Bush Hall. It was, quite frankly, astonishing, and BellX1 are now firmly entrenched in our already quite full hearts as literally one of the most brilliant live bands we’ve seen all year. Except for the Love Bites, of course.

The simple fact is this: BellX1 are very good at their jobs, with most of the band changing instruments at least once during the night to recreate the polar extremes of their sound.

Vaulting from big bollocked rock epic to heart crumbling tear jerker with a quick switch from snare to tambourine, frontman Paul Noonan twitched and yelped his way through tracks from the new album, pausing for calling card ‘Eve, The Apple of My Eye’ much to the melting appreciation of the mostly stripy t-shirted audience.

If you don’t know it, it’s the one that was played on The OC when Mischa Barton lezzed up on a beach.

If there was a gripe to be had, it’s only that Noonan puts a bit too much into his performance. Their songs are amazing and don’t need anyone in a red suit getting all unnecessarily jerky when, really, they deserve to be left to speak for themselves. But who are we to grumble? This band are properly brilliant and they have greased our passage into 2006, making the whole winter experience a far less painful charade.

Just a shame that their name is so rubbish :(.

» Posted by: Michael
»Talk on boards

Craig David stuff - ooh!

Now then. We've just had that Craig David on the phone asking if anyone fancies going to see him play one of his pop concerts in the near future.

Well, do you? There will be two lucky readers going to a show of their choice from his new UK tour and three, somewhat less lucky readers who'll win his back catalogue to enjoy at their leisure.

Get entering...

» Posted by: Tim
»Talk on boards

Love Bites: update!

Look, we know we will have to stop banging on about the Love Bites at some point. But that point isn't this morning.

So, we went out as a riotous troupe on Wednesday night, forging our way up to Islington to see the Bites play their first ever proper, in-the-eveing, in-front-of-actual-punters gig.

And they were amazing. Bites fanatics climbed on tables and waved posters about. There was an outbreak of uncontrolled dancing during, 'You Broke My Heart'.

They played a new, untitled song that was very nearly proper metal. Aimee's hair looked brilliant. Hannah was so nervous she didn't smile until it was over. Nicki looked ready to take on everyone in the room. Dani remained spectacularly calm throughout.

'He's Fit' provoked hysteria. We waved our drinks about and shouted encouragement (as did everyone else, to be fair). They covered The Primitives' 'Crash' and revealed it would be a future b-side.

When it was over we piled out grinning like lunatics on a day trip. This can only be a good thing.

» Posted by: Rob
»Talk on boards

"He does drugs, I don't agree!"

It's another world exclusive! Can we get an "OMG!"

Thanks! Here, and only here, is the brand new video for the brand new single by the very spectacular Love Bites - 'He's Fit'.

Doesn't Aimee look uh-mayzing?

And, and, and...

We're all off to see them tonight at the Islington Academy for their first ever proper gig! If you are too we'll see you there. We'll be the dangerously overexcited ones gulping their drinks and shouting a lot.

Suffice to say, the excitement level in our office is already fairly feverish...

Enjoy!

» Posted by: Slashmusic
»Talk on boards

Parks of the job, innit?

Someone just called us up and said: "Hello! We would like to offer your readers some tickets for an Alex Parks pop concert on Friday February 10. Do you think anyone would be interested?"

Well, of course they would! Who wouldn't? After all, we thought, we spoke to Alex recently and she was very amusing.

Perhaps her concert will be funny too? Who knows? Anyway, we said yes.

So, if you want to go, get entering.

And good luck!

» Posted by: Slashmusic
»Talk on boards

There's a world outside your window...

... and it's a world where great big bottle-nosed whales are swimming up and down the bloody Thames!

And this is what we can see when we look out the big window in front of us. A bit.

As one of us noted a few minutes ago, it's like the ultimate dog-in-the-playground moment caught live on Sky News for ever.

» Posted by: Slashmusic
»Talk on boards

The Bell X factor

We've been looking forward to the album by Irish mournsters Bell X1 for a while now. In fact, we loved their previous tear-stroked balladry so much that we felt there was no choice but to slip ‘em a wink and add them to our list of things we're excited about in 2006.

So, naturally, it was a fearful moment when we listened to said new album ‘Flock’ this morning. After all, everyone can make mistakes, and we are only human. Perhaps it was going to be utter horseshit and we'd have to take it all back.

But like a pot of gold hot-pants at the end of a rainbow flag, ‘Flock’ is a thing of some beauty.

And, hey, the first track's called 'Reacharound', so how bad can it be? Anyway, from the goosebumper 'Bad Skin Day' to the Brendan Benson-does-Franz Ferdinand ale-house sing-along of 'Flame', BellX1 are indeed bloody great.

There - and we didn't write bell-end once!

Amazing! Well done us and well done the Irish!

» Posted by: Michael
»Talk on boards

Love Shak

Ah Shakira, how much do we really really love thee?

Let us count the ways...

1. Last night at your exclusive album launch party there were waiters and waitresses in the near-nude, like how you are on the cover of your new album 'Oral Fixation Vol 2'. They had fig leaves and apples and everything! Adam & Eve-tastic!

2. We loved the free drinks, especially the Caipirinhas (mmm, lemony). The mushroom pasta things - also good. Best were the chocolate shoes, although you couldn't eat a whole one. (Well, we couldn't. We just picked at the upper.)

3. We very much loved the poster of you with a bee on your lip that was stuck all over the walls of the very posh looking Porchester Hall. Hope you don't mind that we nicked one.

4. We loved how, after your first song 'Costume', you said thanks to important record label fella Rob Stringer. We thought it was especially lovable that you had a piece of paper taped next to your setlist with the words "Thanks to: Rob Stringer" typed on it!

5. We're still extremely keen on the way you're able to freely isolate and move parts of your body that would normally only be able to respond in such a way after a particularly nasty dislocation, say, after a horse riding accident.

6. It goes without saying that our heart swelled when you sang some of 'Hey You' straight at us then giggled when we got all embarrassed and shy.

7. Most of all we love you because you're a pop genius. And you don't get many of those to the centavos.

So that's seven ways in which we love Shakira. Quite a lot, really.

» Posted by: Tim
»Talk on boards

What are this lot called again?

Oh yes, it's the Love Bites! We seem to remember mentioning them before at some point.

Anyway, we've made the film to end all films about them, which we will run very soon. Until then, you may want to have some casual good times with this competition, which promises the winning BOY a night out with Ver Bites, or the winning GIRL a trip to Top Shop with Aimee, Dani, Nicki and Hannah in tow.

The mind, truly, boggles.

What about, you ask, if I'm a girl and I don't want to go to Top Shop, or, I'm a boy and I do?

Tough! Those are the prizes, so get over it...

Anyway, the band have also restarted their incredible school tour. If they play in your school, email us and tell us what it was like and, if we believe you, we'll send you a lovely prize of something we have knocking about in the office.

» Posted by: Rob
»Talk on boards

Look at these things we like!

It occurred to us this morning that we haven't done a playlist for ages. This is good and bad. Bad in the sense that some brilliant records may have gone astray in the mean time, but good in the sense that 2006 has already thrown up some stuff we really, really love.

Like these:

Jahcoozi ‘Fish’ (Kitty-Yo)
With the best use of the word ‘fish’ in recorded history, this album track burrows its way into your brain and sits there like a benevolent earwig emitting waves of electronic niceness.

C-Mone ‘Watching U’ (Son)
Not only is C-Mone officially a-may-zing, but this album track gets extra kudos for the line ”boy girl kiss kiss", which is surely the most romantic lyric EVAH.

Kelis 'Bossy' (LaFace)
At last, Kelis returns with a none-more-hooky slice of alterno-R'n'B. The first single from her forthcoming album ‘The Puppeteer’, this is a self-referential, low slung monster of a record.

Nathan Fake 'Charlie's House' (Border Community)
At last, a genuinely brilliant piece of electronica that has room for tunes and melody and light and shade and - oh blimey - emotion and all that stuff. Great album too...

Beverley Knight ‘Take Another Piece of My Heart’ (Polydor)
Tired of belting out her own songs, the very lovely Bev has chosen to belt out someone else’s for once in an attempt to blow the cobwebs off her career and our eardrums. Good thinking all round.

Gnarls Barkley ‘Crazy’ (Warners)
A deceptively simple choon so amazing that we were unable to resist staggering over to ask a DJ what on earth he was playing on a boozy night out at the end of last year. It sounds just as good now we’re sober(ish).

David Ford ‘I Don’t Care What You Call Me’ (Independiente)
Second single from former Easyworld frontman. We're thinking it's even better than the first...

Plan B - 'Someone Switched In Harvey Nicks' (download)
Ben Drew's disturbing / disturbed re-think of The Mitchell Brothers' 'Harvey Nicks' single. Based on real-life events and available as a free download.

These are great too:

Diane Cluck - 'My Teacher Died' (Voodoo-Eros)
Jim Noir 'A Quiet Man' (My Dad)
Children of Bodom 'Rebel Yell' (Island)
Tiga 'Pleasure From The Bass' (PIAS)
Mstrkrft ‘Easy Love’ (Last Gang Records)
Winter Kids ‘I’m Not Used To You’ (Demo)
John Jacob Niles - 'Go 'Way From My Window' (Empire Musicwerks)
The Strokes ‘Razor Blade’ (Rough Trade)
C-Mone ‘Poetry In Motion’ (Son)
Regina Spektor - 'Us' (Warners)
Kate Smith ‘Curious’ (Demo)
James Roberts 'Sun Somehow' (Dell'Orso)
Jel 'All Day Breakfast' (Anticon)
Beck ‘Ghettochip Malfunction Hell Yes’ (Geffen)
Graham Coxon ‘Standing On My Own Again’ (Polydor)
The Crimea ‘Baby Boom’ (Warner)
The Source feat. Candi Staton ‘You Got The Love’ (Positiva)
C-Mone ‘Second After Second’ (Son)
Pharrell Williams ‘Where’s Yours At?’ (Star Trak)
Corinne Bailey Rae ‘Put Your Records On’ (EMI)
Grimethorpe Colliery Band - 'En Aranjuez Con Tu Amor' (RCA)
The Black Madonnas ‘Dirty River' (Truck)

» Posted by: Slashmusic
»Talk on boards

Brit of a farce

We're not sure who the 2006 Brit Awards judges are. We think they're probably Jo Whiley, Jimmy Saville and that bloke who used to play piano on 'Playschool', Jonathan Cohen. But heavens to Betsy, what were they thinking with this nomination:

Best British Single
Tony Christie Ft. Peter Kay - '(Is This The Way To) Amarillo' ?

We don't write the rules, but how on earth can a record that was originally released by Christie in 1971 be eligible for this accolade? If we're allowing re-releases then what about Elvis Presley? The King had 17 top ten hits last year, where's his nomination for Best International Male? Wherever he is, we bet this snub has set that New Year diet right back.

And can we point out to the panel, and to anyone else who still hasn't quite grasped this, PETER KAY DOES NOT SING ON THE SODDING RECORD!
He's just in the funny video which probably shouldn't be taken into consideration when you're deciding how good a song is. Just a suggestion.

Phew, it feels good to get that off our chests. There's nothing wrong or suspect about the other nominations though. Dizzee Rascal (who released no records last year) and Ms Dynamite (who sold virtually no records last year) for Best Urban, no problem there. Charlotte Church and Natasha Bedingfield for Best Female, who would argue that they weren't at the top of their game? And it's perfectly correct that Shayne Ward should be there for Best Single, even though it missed the cut-off date to be eligible...

Sigh.

February 15 can't come soon enough.

» Posted by: Tim
»Talk on boards

Is this the worst programme ever made?

The last year has seen us endure some of the worst TV programmes ever created. Who could forget the tawdry pile-up that was ‘Celebrity Wrestling’, or the jaw-dropping horror of watching emotionally stunted families pretend to be popstars on the rubbish ‘Rock Around The Block’.

Frankly, we didn’t think TV could get any worse – then we watched ‘Soapstar Superstar’ and
wanted to kill ourselves for doing so.

The premise seems fairly straightforward – a ‘Pop Idol’-style show for some of the nations 'best loved' soap stars. However, what could have been hi-larious is actually so bad it hurts. And here's why:

1: The presenter. Every TV talent show needs a first rate, prime time presenter. 'Popstars' had Davina, 'Pop Idol' had Ant and Dec. 'Soapstar Superstar' has mumsy daytime telly host Fern Britton. Ouch.

2: The set, which looks, at best, like a 'Blue Peter' attempt to attempt to replicate the 'Pop Idol' look. Maybe most of the budget was frittered away on material for Fern’s plus-size frocks, because there was clearly no expense spent elsewhere.

3: The judges. Billy Sammeth's claims to fame are managing Olivia Newton John and Cher about a thousand years ago. Chris Cowey was famous for producing 'Top Of The Pops' when it was rubbish and Cilla Black is just a past-it ITV throwback whose contribution to the show is to lech over the male contestants like a senile grandma. Ouch again.

4: The voting. Instead of simply voting for your favourite, we can now also vote for the song each contestant sings on the next show. So, rather confusingly, there are numerous voting options for each contestant, making voting for a favourite contestant a nigh-on impossibility for the average slack-jawed viewer.

5: The contestants. Eschewing the comedy element of 'Celebrity Fame Academy', the singers on 'Soapstar Superstar' seem to be taking it all extremely seriously. This wouldn’t be so bad, if everyone other than Roxanne Pallet and Corrie goth Richard Fleeshman weren’t so blindingly awful. Wendi Peters gurns incessantly, Lee Otway does a bizarre little boy lost routine, and often it's like watching ten mental patients struggling their way through a karaoke contest they barely even know they're in.

And so it goes on. And on. So, in answer to our earlier question then.

Yes. It is. By a long, long way.

» Posted by: Mark
»Talk on boards

Love letters straight to our hearts!

Readers, you may remember us declaring our undying wub for the rather wonderful Jahcoozi back in, ooh, 2005.

And so you can imagine our rosy-cheeked delight when, as we were rooting through our new year postbag, we came across this missive from Jahcoozi singer Sasha Perera, all the way from Berlin!

Hey

I am the singer of Jahcoozi. I'm thrilled that you like my album Pure Breed Mongrel. I love getting feedback from the UK. Big up Channel 4!

Best

Sasha Perera

Bless! It's just like one big cosy loved-up mutual appreciation society, is it not?


» Posted by: Amy
»Talk on boards

Coronation St loves the Bites!

Sometimes the telly is bloody great - and it certainly was last night.

During a particularly nail-biting scene in the special Sunday night episode of 'Coronation Street', troubled teen David Platt skulked off to his room in fury at his mum's new boyfriend.

Once there, he toyed with that eternal teenage conundrum - why am I so much more sensitive than everyone else?

And what group, of all the groups in the world, did young Platt choose to soundtrack his trauma?

Why, the Love Bites of course! What teenage bedroom would be complete without a copy of 'You Broke My Heart'?

Clearly none. Now all we need is C-Mone popping up on 'Holby City' and we're done.

» Posted by: Rob
»Talk on boards


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