Edwina Currie Q&A

How did she cope with two weeks of living with John McCririck?

What did you think Wife Swap might be like?
Well in JJ’s dreams I would have swapped with Jordan! I hoped that I might get to go abroad. I also thought that I might swap with a family who runs a circus or that I would have to do something really physically demanding. The thing is once you say yes to Wife Swap you just have to swallow your fears and think all I can do is try my best.

Who would you have like to swap with?
It would have been nice to live with Brad Pitt or George Clooney. I probably wouldn’t have come back! It would have been nice to stay with Jamie Oliver; he would have made me some lovely food.

Who would have been your worst nightmare?
My worst nightmare would have been living with 5 horrible teenagers – perhaps the Osbournes. I would have found that very difficult to cope with. If I’d have been with loads of teenagers I would have gone to a disco with them. I would have even tried a spliff. I have never tried drugs, I would have had to ask them what to do with it!

Swapping with the Hamiltons would have been a nightmare too– Christine deserves a halo for living with Neil.

What did you think when you saw who it was?
My immediate reaction was this is going to be more interesting than I thought because I used to go racing and I thought that I would enjoy that immensely. During the swap we went to the race tracks twice and I won both times. My tactics were to ignore any tips that John McCririck told me!

What did you like about your new life?
Going racing was terrific. I loved meeting lots of different people at the race courses.

What was the hardest thing about your new life?
The hardest thing about my new life was being cooped up in a rabbit hutch with John McCririck especially during the hottest week of the year. When he is not working he goes to bed all day. When he wants something he justs shouts his orders downstairs. He is like a hamster in a cage. You have to chuck food in every so often. Another difficult thing was seeing too much of John’s body. I saw rather too much for my liking.

What was John like?
John is very hard to explain – what you see IS what you get. He is just this large loopy 60 year old man who acts like a 6 year old child. He is so demanding. I know John found life very tough without the Booby and I know he found me impossible to live with. John thought I was the guest from hell. But all I was trying to do was to get him out of bed and to sit down at the table for dinner.

John’s behaviour is real and that makes him, in my eyes, a rather tragic figure. He has a good brain and he has had an excellent education. Yet he spends most of his time just telling people how the odds are going. It is a pointless existence. He has never lived up to his own potential and he knows it. It is sad. He has chosen a very easy job. He could be doing something more profound. I think that is where his anger comes from. And he is especially angry towards successful career women.

Did you manage to change John?
No, not a scrap. I wasn’t prepared to indulge him at all. John wanted to stay in bed and I wanted him to get out. That was it. I thought John would be a more interesting person than that.

Has it changed anything about the way in which you live?
Yes – it’s made JJ and I appreciate each other more. JJ spent the next few weeks after the swap doing even more around the house than normal and without me telling him what needed to be done.

Is there anything you wish you’d done differently?
I wish I had drunk that glass of wine and not thrown it over John!

If you went to live in the house now, what would you do?
I wouldn’t go back there. But if I had to I would probably escape and take the dogs and cats with me. I would free the animals!

Were you pleased with your rule changes? My rule changes were very difficult to enforce. I was pleased we got John on the tricycle and I was pleased I got him to the park. Other than that he didn’t cooperate at all. It’s a shame as I think he would have enjoyed the rule changes that I wanted to put into place, they weren’t over the top. All I wanted to do was for us to sit down for a meal together.

What advice do you have for John and Jenny?
During the swap I felt sorry for Jenny but I don’t anymore. Not now that I have seen John and Jenny together. I think she is part of a strange game that they are both playing. I think she wants to keep him under her thumb. He needs her and can’t function without her and it suits her to have him so dependent on her. She may be the Booby but John is a grown up baby.

Would you do Wife Swap again?
If I got to live with George Clooney then yes!