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Elissa's household manual
Before filming starts, each wife writes a manual explaining how their house is run. Below are highlights from Elissa's manual.
HOUSEHOLD CHORES
How often do you clean your home?
It is very important to have a clean and tidy home and Steven agrees with me.
I clean the bathroom and kitchen every day. I always keep everything clean and tidy, but Thursday is my big cleaning day. This means changing the beds, dusting, vacuuming, polishing and scrubbing. I am very thorough and if I see a mark or some dirt I have to clean it there and then or else I won't be able to rest. The beauty of having paint rather than wallpaper means that if I notice a mark on the walls I can wash them down.
I have separate cleaning products for the bathroom and the kitchen. All my products are kept in a cupboard under the sink. I also have separate cloths that I use for each room. I wash all dusting cloths in the machine after dusting. This practice follows the BS5750 industrial and catering standard and is very efficient.
Who does the general cleaning around the house?
I do a lot of the cleaning but Steven does help with the housework, cleaning the kitchen floor or vacuuming for example.
WHO DOES THE FOLLOWING, AND HOW OFTEN?
Dusting?
I do the entire house every Thursday.
Tidying?
I tidy the whole house every evening – I just can't live in a mess.
My girls are very tidy too; their Barbies are all very neat. Isabella gets upset if her friends make a mess of her room.
Ironing?
Steven does all the ironing when I'm out at the gym. Steven is very meticulous and makes sure that there are ramline in the shirts. All the clothes in his cupboard have to be colour co-ordinated and must hang on grey hangers not wire ones; he hates them.
Cleaning the bathroom?
I have to clean the bathroom every night. I can't stand the marks on the bath so make sure I give it a really good scrub and I put cleaner down the toilet.
Clothes-washing?
I do all the clothes washing. I have a washing-basket in my bedroom, which everyone uses. We like to hang clothes outside on the line as much as possible, rather than using the drier. Steven often hangs out the washing in the morning. I never, ever, ever hang washing on radiators or around the house; I can't stand this. If it's raining, we use the drier.
On a Thursday I wash everything: sheets and bedding; towels and tea towels; dusters and any other clothes that are lying around.
Cleaning the kitchen?
I clean the surfaces and the floor in the kitchen nearly every evening. I wash the bathroom floor at the same time as I've got the mop out.
I keep my cupboards very well organised. I have all the tins facing forward and stacked on top of each other. It means I can see exactly what we've got in, at all times.
Washing-up?
I usually do the washing-up but Steven will help me.
I always get a bowl of hot soapy water ready before a meal, which the dishes go straight into after we have eaten. All washing up has to be done straight after dinner. When we have people round for dinner, even if its 3am I have to wash the dishes. I couldn't go to bed unless it was done.
Cleaning the car?
Gardening?
My garden is very important to me; there's lots of competition in the neighbourhood as to who has the best garden. Steven's very proud of his hedges he has a block of wood that he uses to make sure they are straight and level. I like to hose down the garden every night. On Friday we mow the lawn and do the weeding.
COOKING / MEALS
Who does the cooking in your house?
We are a Jewish family and I like to keep a nice Kosher house. This means we have guidelines to follow concerning food.
We have 4 different sets of crockery: two for best (when we have dinner parties and guests) and two for everyday use. We also use different sets of crockery for meat products and dairy products, in-keeping with a kosher household.
How often do you sit down and eat together?
We sit down and eat together as a family every night at 6:30pm. Occasionally, Steven works late and so doesn't eat with us. He always lets me know a day or two in advance if he is going to be late.
Where do you eat?
Mostly, we eat at the kitchen table. On a Friday night or if we have people round we eat in the dining room. We never eat on our laps in the living room. I don't allow any food in the lounge; it's a definite rule and the girls know this. I also don't like them having food in their bedrooms.
DAILY ROUTINE
What time do you get up?
My alarm goes off between 7.15am and 7.30am. I get up and immediately open all the curtains in the rooms upstairs, and I turn back all the beds to air them.
How much time do you need to get you and the family ready in the mornings?
My family only need about an hour to get ready in the morning as we all know what we have to do. The girls are old enough now to wash dress themselves. Steven helps Isabella with her hair. He then makes the beds for all of us Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. I make them on Thursday and Fridays when I am at home. I have breakfast with the girls at around 8am.
How do you spend your week-day evenings?
On Monday, Wednesday and Thursday evening, I go to the gym. I leave at 8pm and get back home at 10pm. Meanwhile, Steven is at home doing the ironing. He has his own time on a Tuesday night when he goes out to the pub with his friends.
What time do you go to bed?
I go to bed by 11pm. Steven goes to bed just after me at around 11.30pm
What do you do at the weekend?
Friday night is important in a Jewish household as we bring in the Sabbath. It is a family night so I get everything ready prior to Friday evening. I prepare the dinner on Thursday/ Friday and lay the table (sometimes as early as Weds).
I have to make sure I wash the pots straight after dinner.
On Saturday, the kids often have friends around. We don't work on Saturday as it is the Sabbath. In the evening, we will have take away – the girls go to bed at 8pm/8.30pm.
On Sunday, Steven gets up at 7am and washes both the cars. I sometimes lie-in until 9am. He gets the girls up and gets them dressed, then they play around the house. I get up and drive them to their swimming lessons which take place from 11.30am-12pm. We get home at 12.30pm. In the afternoon we might go to the park and in the evening we have dinner. The girls have a good bath and are in bed by 8pm; no excuses.
DISCIPLINE
Who does the child-care?
The child-care in our house is shared equally between Steven and myself. Steven is brilliant with the girls and they are real daddy's girls. He brushes their hair and is very close to them.
How do you discipline the children?
The first thing I do when disciplining the girls, is to talk to them. If that doesn't have any effect I threaten them with sending them to "the porch". Finally – if I'm at the end of my tether – the girls get a smack. I would never hit them in front of other people, and it would only ever be on their bottom or on their hands. They only get a smack once a year when they are very, very naughty.
THE RELATIONSHIP
Who has the final say in family decisions?
It's fairly equal. In terms of things like holidays: I do, because I control the money. However when it comes to the kids we talk things through.
How would you like to be treated?
I like to be treated like a proper lady; I like to work hard, but play hard too. I like a lot of help around the house and I'm quite a modern lady. I wouldn't like to be treated like a slave. I like to be respected but I also like to have a laugh.
What tips can you give for coping with Steven?
- When you're putting the clothes away, the coats hangers have to be facing the same way
- Make sure that the lid on top of ketchup bottle never drips. He hates it dripping.
- Give him plenty of cups of tea. He loves his cups of tea, he's fanatical about them.
- Steven is very easygoing and placid, but he likes everything clean and tidy. He likes his space in the mornings and he likes to go out with his friends on a Tuesday; he needs to have this night off.
HOUSE PHILOSOPHY
Please sum up the philosophy of this house and life within it.
Our house is a home. People say it's a show home but it's not – we just like it tidy; appearances are very important. Routines are essential in the home. We stick to them and our children thrive on it. We like music, laughter and dance and we do a lot together as a family. Our home is for entertaining and for the children.
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