Mike, 26, Manchester
My only question is why are the Government not taking any action??? I am not a parent... yet, but my memories of Sex Education were 2 Biology lessons in the fourth year of High School and that was it! Children take in information better than people realise, if they are supplied with all the information they will make the right choice. To me it's straightforward, the stats speak for themselves, make Sex and Relationship Education compulsory. The political party that aims to push this will get my vote!!! Channel 4 could you 'air' this programme later in the day for working parents to be able to see? If I wasn't on holiday, I would have missed it. This would obviously create a lot more support.
Maxine
I feel very strongly about this having watched 'let's talk sex' has reconfirmed in my mind just how bad the situation is. I am 21 and did not have sex for the first time till 2 days before my 17th birthday and it was with my boyfriend who although was 5 years older then me understood he had to wait till I was ready, we had been together 11 months before we had sex. This was all down to my own determination and strongmindedness never to do anything i didn't want to, no matter what that was. All this was only possible because i knew the facts and had someone to turn to, my mum. Now none of my friends are able to talk to their mum the way i can even now let alone then. My mum was unable to talk to her mum about anything and she was determined that i was not to feel the same.
The problem with today is as Brit's we don't talk about sex but why? Parents find it embarrassing and that's not going to change unless the next generation of adults have a diffrent attitude. And the only way to achieve this is to get sex and relationships education on the national curriculum, start it early and make it constant.
We have to stand up as a nation and make it happen. let the government know that people really do want it made compulsory!!
Louise, 24
firstly i would like to say well done to davina. The program was fantastic and just goes to show how ignorant this country is regarding such an important and everyday subject such as sex and relationships.
I have a little girl who is just 1 year old but myself and my partner have already spoken about the way we will approach the subject when the time comes but i do think it is important for the schools to get it right as the children come home and talk about what they have learned, thus opening up the lines of communication between parent and child making it easier for children to ask questions and not so awkward for parents to answer.
When i was in school i can count at least four people that did not get to do their GCSEs as they were having babies! and that's not to count the one that had given birth just under a year before! Would it not be in the government's best intersets to improve sex and relationships education to cut down on this happening? i would like to think that by the time my little girl goes to school there will be something done to make sex education compulsary.
Anon
What a great programme! However, it really does need to be on during a prime time slot. I only caught this programme by accident, and was not aware of this fact and really wish I had been, I will be passing what I learned from this programme to all my friends with children, but they really should be able to watch it for themselves. This programme really has shown that many of us are unaware that sex education is not a must in schools, and it really needs to be. I live in SE London where teenage pregnancy is the norm, and when I think back to my school days I think I only had one lesson! This clearly did not work as many of my class mates left school had a baby, (then had another baby) moved in to a council flat and that was the end of the story! That was 12 years ago, What's changed?
Anna, 21
I fully support the programme of education Davina has tried to promote. I went to catholic school and sex and relationship education was virtually non-existent because our religion states that we should not have sex before marriage. However, this is a completely unrealistic view in this day and age and there were 6 teenage pregnancies in my school while I was there. At age 17 we had contraceptive education which consisted of explaining that contraception does not always protect from pregnancy and that we should just abstain. It is ludicrous that SRE is not compulsory as schools will opt out for various reasons and it is the young people who lose out.
Amy
Being In the Last year of my high school, I strongly agree that Sex education is lacking!!
Year 9 was the First and last time we have been taught about Sex. Being a teenager I wondered what "sex" was about and eventually experienced it and undoubtfully the next day regreted it. Sex should DEFINITELY be taught in school. This country is completely losing control. so many girls have babies under 16 and losing out on what they could have had!!! The Goverment need to wake up and realise that sex isn't wrong, it's life.
Pam, 18
Why isn’t sex education compulsory, I just don’t understand it. My school taught regular sex education lessons and yeah I can talk for hours about STIs but I can't tell you how to put on a condom. Our school divided the girls and the boys, the girls went and learnt about periods while the boys learnt about condoms, which is ridiculous because I know you can't rely on the other person to know what to do either. I can't imagine how scary things must be for the people who didn't receive as much info as I did. Our school had a nurse come in who you could see about contraception. This was great, it didn't encourage me to jump into sex but I knew if I needed help I had somewhere to turn, I never would have spoken to my parents they would have killed me, and doctors surgeries aren't private enough there's always someone in the waiting room who knows your folks so they'll find out that way too. Of course kids will have underage sex you can't stop them, but by giving out contraception openly at least they will be doing it safely.
David, Liverpool
Kudos to Channel4 for producing a thought-provoking, well presented piece of television that was well overdue.
With the success of Jamie Oliver in his quest to improve the health of children through school dinners I am confident that Davina will have made a positive impression on the state of sex education. I’m not sure whether Channel 4 have plans to show the programme again but I strongly recommend it to be aired primetime when parents will see it.
Tila
I have just watched let's talk sex and was bowled over by the message it gives. No wonder we have so many problems with teenage pregnancy and STD.
I can however sympathize with parents who have difficulty talking to their children about this matter. I am 35 and have two children age 6 and 1. My experience of sex education was a conversation i had with my mother when I started my periods and she presented me with a bag of towels and I was told not to leave a mess on the toilet seat. So as you can imagine I feel it's important for both my children to get a complete education and I am wondering where I get suitable information to enable me to talk to my kids in a way they can take on board easily. As I had no information given to me either at school or at home I ended up seeking peeps at my father's porn magazines to learn how to have sex, as a result I believe it gave me the wrong imprsseion of what sex was about and I became quite promiscuous, as I didn't relate sex with a loving relationship in any way. It was just fun and a way to be popular. As a result I was pregnant at 18 and couldn't talk to my mum even about that and ended up having an abortion alone with no support at all. Please do all you can to get the government to educate our children correctly.
Charlene, 23
What a relief someone actually has the guts to stand up and say something!
I think relationship and sex education should be made compulsory in schools from an early age. I was quite lucky in the fact that I could go to my mum and ask questions. However, she was embarrassed and referred me to a "Growing Up book" (I was only 5 when I started asking questions).
The only real sex education I received at school was an illustration of a penis inside a vagina (and was told this was sex), and how to deal with periods (which I got at 13. I started my periods at 11 so this was useless).
I was lucky in a way that my mum could direct me to a source that would tell me answers to any questions I had - this made me less curious. This isn't the same as talking to someone though. Not many of my friends could go to their parents, most of them started having sex between 11 and 13 out of curiosity, many have had children early. The realtionship part is important as well - many of my friends thought they had to have sex so early as the were scared of losing their boyfriend.
Karen, Notts
What a fantastic programme - well done channel 4!! I never had any sex education at school in the 70s other than reproduction in frogs! I lost my virginity at 17 and it was down to peer pressure that it happened then! I had no idea at all and it was more luck than judgement that I didn't get pregnant or catch some sort of STI! I have a 17 year old son who i have always been totally open with regarding sex and relationships - he is still a virgin but that is by choice; he had minimum SRE taught via PSHE lessons in school but he always asked me if he wanted to clarify anything (even though he had a very approachable teacher) - why can't this Government stop thinking about Parental choice - a lot of parents in this country don't care - that is the unfortunate reality of it i'm afraid! Why should children from these families be disadvantaged? It just continues the viscious circle of lack of knowledge being more dangerous than having the knowledge. Just because a child is aware of sex and relationships certainly does not make them promiscuous - I think it's exactly the opposite. We have a duty to the children in this country to give them the knowledge they need to make their own choices. Let's do it the Dutch way - it obviously works. This isn't down to the Government losing votes, it's down to their responsibility to the children in this country - get real!!
Rebecca, 26, London
Well done Davina and Channel 4 for highlighting such an important issue. I went to a private girls' school and I think it was thought that nice young ladies didn't need to know about anything to do with sex, and certainly not until we reached the age of consent. We learnt the biological facts that were required for our GSCE, and I recall one 30 minute lesson just before we took our exams in which we were shown the different types of contraception available. We were told what each one did, but not how to use it or where we could obtain it. Thankfully my first sexual experience was with a responsible man who showed me how to use a condom, however that was neither the time nor the place to be learning about these things for the first time!
Stu, Glasgow
Good programme by the way. Just want to say it's about time this bull was gripped by the horns and taught a valuable lesson. That MP Davina spoke to... Well she seemed awfully concerned about keeping adults (parents) on her side. However, I hope when (IF) she watched the programme, she realised these adults she's keeping on side are giggly idiots who could benefit from re-education themselves. Her attitudes are perpetuating a problem which is coming from people like her. The kids are not the problem. They are physically mature and becomming ever more mature mentally, and able to deal with this issue which continues to put the fear of death into their parents. Come on everybody! This problem can be solved. Stop giggling and get rolling (the condoms).
One major point I want to make... Kids and adults - even those who are open to modernising sex education in schools - are for many other reasons still less likely to embrace the fact that differences in sexual orientation exist. In the same way that sex between men and women needs addressing, we need to address THAT issue too - preferably at the same time. Children who think they may be gay should not have to deal with the added pressure of sex lessons they feel are not relevant to them (and which also indirectly encourage prejudice).
Paula, Wiltshire
I've just walked your programme and am astounded at the lack of committment from the government to overcome the current issues we are facing in this country with regard to under age pregnancies and STDs.
I have a daughter who will be 14 in a week and have tried very hard to ensure that she has had all the information I can give her to enable her to understand the issues surrounding sex and relationships. However, I'm 37, came from a working class background and had the standard, very limited, sex eduction which was taught in my school. I feel very strongly that sex education should be taught in schools by professionals and this can then be supplemented by parents at home. After all, I would not try and teach my daughter physics unaided as I have no qualifications to do so. Why should the government feel that I am qualified to discuss sex without having been taught correctly and expect my teaching to be adequate? After all, you don't know what you don't know! I wonder how well I'd fare in the test that was set in the programme? I would fully support any petition to force the government to re-address and implement a programme of teaching to ensure our children have all the information they need in order for them to be able to make informed decisions about their relationships and sexual encounters.
Anon, 29, Manchester
In response to Anon, 27 of Southampton, I think it's an incredibly valuable point that you make, that proper sex education could potentially prevent sexual abuse/rape situations among younger children and teenagers. If young people are told everything there is to know anatomically, sexually etc then they will at least have the power of knowledge to make better informed decisions about situations they may direct themselves or may unwillingly find themselves in. I have seen Let's Talk Sex for the first time today and thought it was absolutely fantastic to be exposed to information that I didn't know, even as a 29 year old woman. It is a shame that my parents being very religious never discussed sex with me (I don't think I could cope if they did!).
The word sex itself is taboo as far as they are concerned. The only education I recall receiving was about menstruation at secondary school. I feel very strongly that sex education should be compulsory, and that teenagers should have access to contraception and information on school sites. It is clear in my experience that if I had been better informed from school (I was most certainly not going to learn this at home), it may have even prevented my having to have a termination by myself with no family support. We need to push the government on this one, get the petitions out Davina.
Lizzie, 18
I thought the programme was brilliant and Davina's point is spot on. I did not receive enough sex education and my mum doesn't talk very openly about sex. I was the first out of my friends to lose my virginity, at 15 and so had no one to tell me what to do. Luckily, i was in a loving relationship and still am with the same guy. Neither of us want children as we take our education seriously, so i am on the pill and we use condoms often. The only sex education i received at secondary school, in year 10, was how to put a condom on, by this point i had already had sex. Too late! Teachers, parents and teenagers are embarrased to talk about sex so we all need a kick up the backside to lower these teenage pregnancy rates. It's dreadful! Something needs to be done about it, i do not want my children (when i have them!) to have a lack of education, i want the best for them in the future, to get as much out of their childhood as possible. I seriously hope that Davina's point gets across sooner rather than later. Something needs to be done.
Terry, 24, Buckinghamshire
Fantastic Show! Well Done Davina!
I am 24, gay and was educated at a selective Grammar School in Buckinghamshire which prided itself on excelled academic and sporting success. However I feel I received massively inadequate sexual and relationship education! Bar 3 uncomfortable lessons at the age of 14 all I learned from sex came only from the playground and from pornography on the internet! It's about time we, as a a modern, western society, learned that it's time to rid ourselves of the taboo surrounding sex. As soon as people become desensitised to the issue, the sooner we can all talk frankly and without inhibition.
Knowledge is the key to confidence and happiness. Children and teenagers need to feel confident that their questions and concerns are received with the respect and sensitivity ALL people of any age deserve.
Malcolm
Thank god you are doing this!!! Thank you. The Government are abdicating responsibility because they are motivated only by votes – they fear getting a popular public issue wrong – and they fear the tabloid media. They fear vociferous protest groups from a minority of parents.
Our present parents were recently children. They are not in a position to lead.
This needs action – like with drugs, alcohol, school dinners.
Some issues need National action.
I am married, 39 and had pathetic education regarding sex. I am happy to contribute and campaign for sex education at all schools.
Rachel, 23, Merthyr Tydfil
What a brilliant program. I completly agree and back Davina 100%. It should be earlier, consistent and compulsory. I had 2 sex education lessons in 11 years of school. One at age 9 (more biology than anything else), and one at age 14 (again biology, with a hint of STIs mentioned). I can honestly say to this day I don't think I have ever talked to my parents about sex and I'm 23! This country definitely needs kick up the bum when it comes to talking about sex. The government NEEDS to do something about this.
Hollie, 20
We have to get sex education compulsory in schools. When I was at school I did sex education once in primary 7 , and then once in secondary school.
Even now I still don't know absolutly everything about everything on this subject. and neither does anyone.
The British public have to crawl out of the dark ages and realise that sex has to be spoken about!!
We have to stop being prudish and just get on with it because it's a fact of life.
I personally think that the only thing that is going to work in anything in the UK is shock tactics or just getting staight to the point. We all would love to think that children would never have sex underage or behind our backs, but we all know deep down that they do!
If they knew everything about sex and relationships maybe they would wait at least until the legal age!
Children work in the way that if you say don't do that ... then they will.
If you tell a child or teenager "don't touch that wall, the paint is still wet" a percentage of children will touch it to see if it really is!!!
Alyson
That was a fab programme! When I was at school we had a class called Social Education (SE) once a week, this rarely involved sex ed. I do remember some videos from primary seven (when I was 11) but they weren't great! I think it's really important for children to learn about relationships and sex from a much younger age. Seven girls from my year have had children as teenagers, god knows how many have actually been pregnant. At the moment I am a youth worker and it worries me that a number of them, as young as 12, are having sex and I can't give them condoms, I can only give them advice which in a lot of cases is not enough! This needs to be dealt with. Stuff "No sex please we're British" – kids are having sex, it's not just teenagers, kids! We need to talk more about sex!!!!
Richard and Jayne, North Lincolnshire
I'm 31 years old and I opted out of Sex Education at school, reason – it was one big joke. My Mum got a book from the library and we went through it together. I didn't go and have sex right away, in fact it had the opposite effect. I lost my virginity when I was nearly 16 and I would have been regarded as "old" if the girls at school knew. I was teased a lot at school and as I had boys asking me out, I was regarded as a "slag" – if only they knew.
My husband and I are so pleased with your programme, we sat down and spoke to my husband's 14 year old son last night and he wasn't embarrassed at talking about it. We were married in 2002 and had our own son in Nov 04. I've just found out I'm pregnant again so this is a big notice to Joe and his teenage school friends that "Oh my god, my Dad is still doing it!".
Your programme is 100% positive and educational and we think at the moment we need to target the parents to get them over any embarrassment and then it will be easier for the kids.
My husband and I would like to help with the campaign to bring Sex Education into our schools earlier – how can we do this?
Abbe, 13
I think sex education should be compulsory in schools so you know the risks of sex.
Jane
I have seen two of Davina's programmes and thought they were great. they should be repeated in the evening so all teenages and parents can have the chance to see them. I think Davina should start a Jamie Oliver style campgain as this is as important as School Dinners. We owe it to the future generations to sort it out now.
Emma 31, Warwickshire
I have a five year old son and I am pregnant with my second. My son asked me if God put the new baby in my tummy, and I said 'yes', because I was not prepared. I foolishly thought that he is too young to understand. The truth is that it is me who lacks understanding, in that I did not receive sex-ed and am unsure of how to best deliver it. Since watching Davina's programme I have decided that I will sit down and explain to my son exactly how mummy and daddy made the baby.
Growing up in a catholic household, sex was a taboo subject, and when my mother decided to talk to me about sex at age 11 I was mortified. The reason for this was that it was too little too late, and we were both embarrased because it was not a subject that was ever discussed. I have realised that if I talk to my son from this age (5) when there is no question of embarrasment, it will become a natural thing for us to talk about. Hopefully he will then feel he can come to me or his dad and ask us questions about sex as he gets older, and it will be an easy subject to discuss. He won't squirm at the idea, as I did with my partents. I was very disappointed with the interview with the minister for children. If she represents the Government's point of view, then it is clear to me that they are more concerned about losing votes / popularity than they are about the future health, welfare and education of our children. We need legislation not wishy washy spineless ministers!
Sandra
I think it should be compulsory in schools, it could be under the heading of Health which could include healthy eating, weight management, exercise, sex and relationships, infections, personal hygiene, and also include Aids, drugs and alcohol and the list could go on and on. I have two girls 6yrs and 12yrs. My 12yr old was told about where babies came from and about the body. This was when she was 11yrs old. this is not enough. it should be part of the curriculum, in all primary schools and secondary schools. If taught properly in primary school maybe we wouldn't have as many 12yr old pregnancies. Give primary school children these virtual reality dolls home and not waiting until they are 15yrs old this is too late for some children.
Siobhan, 19
I just wanted to say what a great programme. I only ever had one sex education lesson at school and then it was just watching a nurse put a condom on a plastic penis. Sex was seen as a taboo subject. This made me more curious to see what it was like, and i lost my virginity when drunk at a party at only 15. Looking back if i had known more about it i wouldn't have been so eager to try it. It's a shame there is little information given to teenagers on sex as, as i know from experience when people go on about it and you know little about it, it makes you want to have sex to see what the big fuss is all about. So fingers crossed the government wi'l buck up their ideas. Well done Davina and Channel 4!
Lisa, 18
I have watched the Let's Talk Sex series the whole way through and am shocked and quite distrubed by what i learnt from it. I feel ashamed to be in a country where our own government are reluctant to provide compulsory sex and relationship education in schools.
I totally agree with Davina that early, consistent and compulsory SRE needs to be approved by the government. I personally went to schools where students got themselves into trouble because of poor sex education. I am to take my final exams soon, am 18, and still go to school with people who have no idea about safe sex or relationships. I find this completely unbelievable.
In the series the fact i found most disgraceful was the government representative who has a warped idea that SRE would shut the parents out. I believe that SRE would give parents encouragment and an opening to talk to their children about sex and relationships. I have to point out, that parents aside, if the pupils in schools are saying they want compulsory SRE then it should be given to them.
Rianon, 14, Brighton
Hi i am a 14 year old teenager and i feel sex education should be compulsory in schools, because even though my mum and dad have talked to me about it when i was watching this program i knew nearly nothing about contraception, the body parts, i didn't even know how you would put a condom on a boy, let alone that you could get more contraception then just condoms. I also feel that it is a good thing to teach younger children about relationships and the diffrent sorts of relationships as this could help them to understand more about gay and lesbian relationships in the future and this i feel will help to stop homophobic remarks.
Carly, 18
I completely agree that it should be made compulsory. I am 18 and from Cumbria and feel the sex education I received was not consistent or particularly helpful. We were told about the anatomy, and provided with booklets produced by 'always sanitary products' but never had any practical lessons ie. learning how to put on the condom. Our relationship education was much better, but again not consistent. In actual fact, I thought sex education was compulsory (as it was how it was portrayed; sort of 'we have to do this bit') when it turns out it isn't and I am very shocked. I think all young people should be provided with the right information, and it is up to the individual what they will do with it. It is a personal choice, and it should be made with good knowledge and understanding, rather than fear and pressure, and inevitable mistakes.
Elaine
I am on leave from work and stumbled across these programmes. They were excellent. Should be shown again at prime time when parents and children can watch them together.
Gemma
Well Done! It amazes me that it is our own government that consistantly tells us that we have the highest percentage of teenage pregnancies, yet when someone like Davinna McCall attempts to deal with this problem it is the government that refuses to co-operate. I was shocked that some schools were giving contraception to children in year 9 but i came to fully understand why this school has taken that approach, as Davina rightly said.....we are just giving children the tools to allow them to have safe sex. My own sex education was very good, i was taught in year 6 and that stayed with me and was then reinforced in every year of my secondary school in designated P.S.E lessons. It is not enough to teach children once... it needs to be reinforced every year... especially as they grow ever closer to having sex. All in all well done Davina and all who were involved in Let's Talk Sex.
Sue, Essex
What a brilliant programme. As Jamie Oliver changed the way we feed our kids at shcool I can see that Davina will change the way we teach our kids sex and relationship education at school. If there was a petition to sign for these changes I would willing ask people to sign it. There would definitely show a positive outcome to this, come 10-15 years time. Obviously it has worked for Holland why can't it work for the UK!
The Minister for Children that was interviewed on today's programme needs a serious wake up call as do all the other parents that disagree with this idea.
Keep the good work going, i am sure you will get results.
Debora
I'm lucky that my daughters and I can talk about sex freely but there are many parents that aren't as fortunate. I've always been of the opinion that if the children are old enough to ask, they're old enough to know. Sex/relationship education MUST be made compulsory in schools because children will often talk about this subject between themselves not knowing the full facts. Keep up the good work Davina!
Nicholas, Brighton
What a refreshing programme. Sex education at school was, for myself, nothing less than appalling. It consisted as a purely biological action and nothing to do with what actually happens. I think that as an educated society something should be done to stem the teenage pregnancy and STD increases. As a gay man nothing was taught to me, and as a result I contracted HIV in my first sexual encounter with another man. It's time something was done.
Nikki, 32
i was a single parent after having a child at age 17. i have since met someone and married and between us we have 3, soon to be, 15 year old children. my sex education at school could be described as poor to non existent and my parents regarded the subject of sex as completely taboo.
i am only aware of our children having sex education once during their time at school, during the last year of primary, and i am unsure of whether it was proper sex education or whether it was merely to inform them about puberty and periods and such.
i talk happily and freely about sex with my kids and feel that this is the only way forward for the children of today.
Kirsty
After watching the programme, it reminded me of the one or two lessons I had in my school. I'm 18 and I still don't know a lot of things that the 15 year olds in Holland know! It is embarrassing to admit you don't know much about the facts of life. Sex is an important part of life, to create, and too many of us don't know how to do it safely.
I do agree with making it compulsory it would definitely make things easier to talk about and the rate of abortion Britain has, would go down which would be so great, as I'm totally against abortion, it's wrong. If we knew more about how easy it is to get help, things wouldn't get out of hand.
The only thing I don't agree on is teaching children in Primary school, about sex, as to me it ruins their childhood. I would have been mortified at that age. Teaching relationships is a good thing though, it may help to prevent abuse.
Susan, london
i was watching your programme this week and thought it very interesting especially when you went to the dutch schools. parents start shouting about why didn't they give us protection when their girl is pregnant or to their son if he's the dad. when is this country going to wake up and stop blaming every one else for the short comings of people of any age having sex. parents moan about it's their right to teach their kids about that but how many do due to one thing or another. if children learn all aspects of life whether it's gays or straight maybe not so many kids will feel isolated if they're gay. it's a fact of life and it's not going to go away if we say or do nothing. if the government can't make up its mind then maybe the teenagers should make the choice for themselves. forewarned is forearmed isn't it? we teach our kids to do nearly every thing in their lives from dressing them selves to driving a car, and we try to protect them from any thing that's going to harm them. well aren't the parents failing them if they don't teach them to protect themselves against sdt/hiv/unwanted kids.
Sam
i think sex ed should be part of school life. i am 27. my sex ed was very poor and had to learn the hard way. i now have three step children and i am very worry about the lack of information they are getting about sex from school. something needs to be done or STIs and teen prenancies will just keep rising.
Gemma, 21
I think this programme is excellent and believe that Davina should be to Sex ed what Jamie was to school dinners! Get a change in place, make something happen. Surely a government's policies and decisions are based around facts and statistics, the ones from Holland should be enough to make a change. Teenage pregnancies and STIs are going to get worse if nothing gets done. It's time for parents to face facts, we are not as innocent as you all think, stop being so old fashioned, 'kids' are going to have sex, help them do it safely.