Nikki, 37
I'm 37 and currently training to be a paediatric nurse, so the topic of sex education is very important to me. My sex education in school was extremely poor involving little more than an explanation of the male and female reproductive organs. I came from a single parent family and my mother was very open about sex fortunately. I received sex education from her from an early age, about 10 years as I remember. I lost my virginity at 17, it was my choice after knowing all the facts. I had started taking the pill beforehand in readiness for the event.
Becky, 21, Derby
I am 21 and have a 6 year old son. sex education wasn't very good at all when i was at school and gave very little information and being too afraid to ask my parents any questions i ended up pregnant at 15. Although i was one of the lucky ones and i am still with the father of my son it doesn't always end up like this. oh too many times we see single teenage mums having to manage on little money with little help and information. And with the government complaining that there are more and more people claiming benefits what else are these poor mums supposed to do? The government needs to tackle the problems at the root and bring on better sex education make teens aware of their actions and give them people they can talk to as advice isn't always on hand at home!
Lauren, 17
I am totally behind Davina 100% she is trying to change the way teenagers see sex. I am 17 and still a virgin and i'm not ashamed to say it. i am going to wait until i am ready and in a loving relationship. My boyfriend when i was 14 asked me to do it on valentine's day and i said yes to make him happy but i didn't go throught with it because i was scared and i thought no one can make me do something i don't want to. The holland sex education is a bit explicit but if it works then i say good on them.
Tanya, West London
I am team leader in PSHE in a London Comprehensive. I fully support your aim to have sex education taught much earlier in school as well much more open and extended debates taking place throughout school.
However, we are hampered by our prescriptive, academic curriculum that takes precedence over helping our young people develop the skills necessary to live happily and safely in the world they are living in. Beyond this we have no properly funded Youth Service that could offer our youth useful advice and skills in a safe environment.
in addition we need to engage with complex cross-cultural issues. You rightly focus on the lack of political will to really address this and until we all stand up for our Youth nothing will change.
Christine, Plymouth
Davina, children don’t belong to the state. Be explicit with YOUR children – not with mine! You haven't researched how a person's psychological development is affected by promiscuous relationships; their worthless feelings at being just a piece of meat or that contraception, even 'double dutch', is not 100% – hence the rising abortion rate. Economist Dr David Paton, showed that explicit sex ed delivered to pregnancy hotspots made no difference whatsoever. Our kids are taking part in a liberal social experiment of hurt and abuse. The way forward for happiness and fulfilment is not 'safe sex' but 'saved sex' – abstinence – and behaviour change.
Rebecca, 25
I was encouraged to see a programme like this getting some substantial air time and receiving support from a well known and accessible personality. My only regret is that it is not scheduled in a prime time slot. This is just as important as the healthy eating campaign fronted by Jamie Oliver and deserves the same coverage and attention. As a midwife I see the results of the poor standard of sex education in the UK and I feel we are failing children in our refusal to consider our problems and act effectively. It was so refreshing to hear educationalists talk about the need to include sex education as part of an overall approach to love and relationships. The UK standard appears to ignore this essential connection and sex education is left as an abstract and empty concept with no context.
Gemma, 17
The first time I received sex education was at 11 years old. It wasn't really sex education, the boys were split form the girls which I think was wrong because the girls need to know about the boys and the boys need to know about the girls. I was told about periods. I was also shown all the different sanitary towels, tampons were not an option. I didn't know what a tampon was until I started my period at 12 years old. My mum had to explain things to me which I found very awkward and I could tell she did too. We were also told about the changes our bodies would go through, like developing breasts or pubic hair. To this day I still have no idea what was said or explained to the boys.
The next part of sex education was when I was 13 years old. We were spoken to by a lady who explained these topics: The body, Contraception, Pregnancy, STIs.
Although this seems like a lot of information this was only an hour long lesson, how can children possibly take in all that in that short space of time. I remember that every child in that room felt awkward we didn't feel as if sex was a good thing or something that people could enjoy. We saw it as something embarrassing. There were so many questions I desperately needed answering but I was too frightened ask. I couldn't ask anyone. From then on sex education would occasionally pop up in science lessons or it came round once a year just covering exactly the same things every time. Each lesson still as uncomfortable as the next.
Most of my sex education came from magazines, learning from other people's mistakes, while still making my own after being so misguided. I was so desperate to find the answers to my questions that i experienced sex at a terribly early age...14, I needed to understand.
I believe children should get sex education from as young as they are able to understand and they should feel comfortable talking about sex. They should ask the questions I didn't.
Thank you for your time.
Louise, 21, West Sussex
I caught the programe today and wanted to say WOW! I think the methods you showed Holland using were fantastic and should be adopted over here as soon as poss!! I think the only thing that would stop it is british prudishness. The head teachers were worried about what the media would say about their schools, but it is the media's responsibility to get on board and help convince sceptics that this method of teaching not only about safe sex, but emotional awareness, is just SO important! And for parents who are upset that they are not doing the teaching: well there's nothing stopping them doing it as well. The more children realise that sex is about love, and also something they shouldn't be embarrassed about discussing, the better. I was taught the 'technical' side of sex at school after year 9, for one hour each year until I finished GCSEs. Thankfully my mum had always let me know I could ask her anything, and I often did. I'm 21 now and still practicing safe sex. I've only had 3 partners and they were/are long term boyfriends. I think the Double Dutch thing is GREAT, and that children should be taught about homosexuality as well as heterosexuality and start the whole process at a young age so that it is normal for children.
Sara, 30, Kent
Fantastic program!!! I am a 30 year old mother of 2, one of nearly 9 and a 7months. When my eldest started school I was shocked by the sort of questions she brought home. At the age of 5 she was called a lesbian by another 5 year old for kissing another girl on the cheek! Now at nearly 9 she sees anything to do with the body as hilarious, from farting, to the boys in her class making up songs about their willies. After watching today I have changed my views on when to talk to her about sex as I had planned to put it off until she was in her early teens.
The main problem I can see being faced with by educating her myself at home is that my daughter is very loud and outgoing and will be sure to want to tell her friends all about it, as she's shown by giving anyone who would listen a full lecture on breast feeding not long after her little sister was born.
I know from other mums that sex education in their homes ranges from stories of stalks and no sex before marriage, to just the minimum in answer to their little queries, as we have done.
If this is going to work we will all need to be saying the same things at the same time to make any difference. (preferably as a group in school as it will help take away the "I know something you don't know" factor).
Many, many thanks channel 4! First Jamie now Davina, so glad we have the British media to tackle these issues in our schools when the government are too busy just trying to stay popular instead of looking out for our kids' health and welfare!!!
Chris
I was very lucky to have been working at home today and able to watch your program presented by Divina. I am a Parent Govenor at my daughter's high school in Warrington. My daughter is thirteen years old.
I feel very strongly that the approach taken by the Dutch authorities prooves beyond any doubt that we are getting it very wrong in this country, and it is about time our Government took a much closer look at the statistics. Vast amounts of money are spent each year on programs in and out of the educational field, and are nowhere near as important as the issue of sex education and its updating. We are still in the dark ages in the way this subject is approached in our schools.
The only way forward is for a joint effort from all parties including the Government, local education authorities, the school Governors, Teachers and also parents in general, all giving input to achieve a better understanding of sex and not have our children growing up with sex being a taboo subject.
I feel that strongly about this issue that I will be taking it up now with the school and the L.E.A. to try and move things on in our area.
Many thanks for a most interesting program, well done channel 4.
Andrea
just finished watching your programme on "let's talk sex"! I strongly believe that this country has a BIG problem with under aged unwanted pregnancies!
I have 3 children aged 16, 5 and 2! As my 16 year old has been growing up i have been very very open about sex. i sat and told him about sex from the age of 9! I was very frank with him by telling him that i didn't want him to have sex before he was 16–19 years old but that it was up to him when thought he was ready! He is now 16 just! We over the years since he was 9 years old have talked about feelings and the responsibilities of sex! And i have always told my son that he should use both the pill (girl of course) and a condom! We even with my two younger children sat in our kitchen putting condoms on carrots! and to my surprise the 5 year old and my 2 year old did a better job than my 16 year old! We had a laugh they weren't shy or giggly! I'm glad and grateful for your programme as we as a country need a better sex education! I AM all for the way holland handle their sex education! Britain NEEDS to look and learn! We need that kind of sex education if we want to get teen pregnancies down! We need to put aside parents and religion for a while and think about our future, those being the younger generation! I'm all for it being taught just how they do in holland! Bring it on d! I look forward to see what Tony Blair says when he sees what your programme has shown how holland has taught their children! Good luck! as you're going to need it with all the old fashioned english we have in this country!
ALL my surport and thanks!
Emma, 16
After watching your 'let's talk sex' programme for the last couple of days my eyes could not believe the amount of problems that occur in the UK with sex.
I was very pleased with your approach towards it as it makes you think (well certainly me) what can actually happen because of sex.
I am actually learning to teach children aged 0–8 and currently with 5 year olds at the moment. I could never imagine having to teach them about sex and relationships however I was amazed with Holland's methods.
As for sex ed myself I never had it, I relied on my mum to help me understand the concept of why when I was playing with my Barbie's and dollies why were my 12 year old friends doing this.
Now I am 16 years old I have a boyfriend who I have been with for 12 months and my friends however... Well u can guess where they are!
Anon
i saw the show this morning and was very impressed. I think sex education from an early age is necessary. I had my first child at 20 yrs old and brought her up as a single working mother. It was hard work but i had lots of good family support. The simple fact is that no one is ever fully prepared for the arrival of a child but if teenagers were aware of the cost, hard work, sleepless nights and responsibility in having a child they might not start sexual relationships so early. Sex education at my grammar school was one biology lesson when 15!!
If we can talk about sex in an easy, normal way then we get rid of the mystery and if well-informed we have real choice.
Hannah, 15
I'm a 15, nearly 16 year old girl. I've been off school for a few days ill and I've being watching the "Let's Talk Sex" program on tv. I think the sex education the Dutch get is great. I don't want to be told about all the negatives of sex all the time. We should learn how to use contraception so we don't get pregnent or get STI's and we should learn about feelings and what to do in a situation where we feel presurised into having sex. I havn't had intercourse yet and don't plan on doing until i reach 16 or 17 or something but some of my friends have either had sexual intercorse or have had oral sex and a lot of them have had bad experiences with it. The ones who have had intercourse felt presured, couldn't put the condom on properly and ended up having unprotected sex when they really didn't want sex at all and the ones who have had oral sex were terified beacuse they didn't know how to touch the penis or how to give him a blow job, and the guy certainly didn't know how to go about giving the girl oral sex. So basicaly it was a really bad, uncomfortable and awkward experiance for all of them. One of my friends wanted to masturbate instead of having sex because she didn't feel ready to have sex but didn't know how to masturbate so she went on the internet to try and find out but it didn't help her much and she kept getting porn pop-ups after. Luckily my boyfriend hasn't presurised me into sex, he's letting me do things i feel comfatable with. We do a lot of kissing, I've "wanked him" and i would be prepared to give him a blow job if i felt comfortable with it at the time, but that's as far as i'm prepered to go.
The government should take note of your program, we definitly need better sex ed and resorces like the dutch have.
Lynsey, 19
My name is Lynsey. I'm 19 years old. I lost my virginity when I was 18. Although I waited until I was in a relationship and wanted to lose it, it wasn't down to me learning anything in school. I remember being completely confused about anything to do with sex. Everything I learned was through my own experience or through my friends. Even then when some of my friends talked about a few things I didn't understand, I was too embarrassed to ask them about it in case they thought I was stupid. I also remember feeling pressured into doing things because everyone was doing it. Now all my friends turn round to me and say they really respect me because I waited until an older age. I have friends who lost their virginity when they were 13 and really regret it. This scares me, as my sister is 12. I think your programme is fantastic and it's made me want to be as open as the Dutch are with my children when I have them. Your programme teaches children to respect themselves and sex should be something they WANT to do with the right person. I think Britain needs to wake up and be realistic. Sex shouldn't be taboo, it's completely natural. If my children were to have sex education in school I'd prefer that it be done properly, so they understand and are educated to make their own choice and hopefully the right choice. I really hope your programme wakes Britain up to reality. Keep up the fantastic work.
Angela
I have just watched the program and felt i had to respond especially as i had an abortion myself at 16. I had a wonderful relationship with my parents but the true intimacy of sex was never discussed. I have an 8 year old girl and a 5 year old boy. i really feel they need a scale of sex education from an early age up to 16. I have discussed a certain amount with my children (only my daughter seems to have taken any interest) about periods, when it might happen, and what it means. Also about making love to someone we are in love with and all the feelings that go with it. Her first reaction was "that's disgusting" but as she asked me all the questions i felt she deserved the correct answers. I also left the door open by saying anytime you want to ask a question i will answer it the best i can
Anon
As a 36 year old mother of three girls this is a subject close to my heart, and I really admired the part of the program I caught today. Should we all move to Holland for a simple and straight forward Sex Education?
My eldest is nine, and has known about sex since she asked at the age of 4. Sex education has to start at home. I have always taken the approach that if they ask, you tell them honestly, and at an early age. When they stop asking questions, then they have heard enough. It's amazing how many questions three girls and their friends can ask in the car between school and home. Sex was never a taboo in my parents' house when I grew up, and I hope it is never one between my children and I.
Sex education at school for my children has started with dealing with relationships. So far my nine year old has been invited to a mother and daughter evening. A brilliant concept with very high attendance rate, but a wasted opportunity. The information was aimed right over their heads, in fact the terms talked about made it hard for a mother of three to follow. If periods etc are talked about at this level what hope is there when they talk about sex?
The talk left me having to go through it all again, if the children are left this muddled at the fundamental stages of Sex Education, when they already have a good understanding of the subject, I fear for when the subject is discussed in terms of emotion, contraception and choice.
As I said, in the current climate, sex education has to start at home, but wouldn't it be fantastic if everyone could get an equal education and understanding from school, giving everyone the right to make an informed choice about something that could change their lives irreversibly.
Catholic family, Daughter 9yrs, son 8yrs
Abstinence, (let's face it...it is the safest) is good, but kids are influenced by more than the church, and like sex and drugs, church will be up there on the list of things they will soon have to make choices. Because of this I feel that along with the church teachings strong informative sex education is vital and at an early age. My daughter has already told me that a friend at the same Catholic school said that their sister had a baby at 12 years and that it's really cool and they want the same. Aged 35 I struggle to understand churches' explanation on the contraception ban. How are teens supposed to understand. The church approach alone will not work. Kids respond better to advise if it is given with full explanations, pro's and con's. The simple instruction "don't do it" is an open invitation for kids to find our for themselves why. "don't do it because....." followed by open discussion works better. Bring on the Dutch system....you have my Catholic support.
Steven
Hey there!
Watching the programme on how they talk about sex & relationships in Holland, I’m proudly shocked at how young people can freely talk and learn about it. As a youth worker I would really want to do something like was done in the youth club shown but it is really hard to do so when society thinks that sex is a major taboo. Well done Davina & Channel 4 for tacking this head on!
Nikki, 37
I have just watched Davina's programme and as a 37 year old mother of a 7 and 11 year old, I found it to be so much more educational than anything I was ever taught in sex education at school. We are all well aware of our ever increasing teenage pregnancy rate and S.T.I. problem and yet nothing the Government has done has reduced this trend. The Dutch example, although at first was quite shocking, did make total sense and has a proven success. Our Government needs to be pro-active in trying something more radical in order to get results like the Dutch. Our whole society has such major hang-ups over issues such as this, but in reality does very little to educate our children appropriately. It's about time our attitudes changed to give a better life for our children and for us to not keep on making the mistakes of previous generations but essentially blaming the youth of today! An excellent programme and an excellent example to how it should be done, I'd fully support it for my children.
J, 19, Somerset
hi i'm so glad that someone is finally trying to sort out the state of the sex ed in this country. the only sex ed lessons i had at school were one in year 6 aged 11 about periods and what goes where during sex to make babies. contraception wasn't even mentioned in school until we were in year 10 that's aged 14/15 and this only happened because a girl in our year group had to leave school because she was pregnant!!!!! most people i was at school with were already having unprotected sex by that point purely because they had never been taught about it at school. i was very lucky and my parents taught me the basics at home but for some people like a friend of mine this just isn't possible as parents arent always aproachable about sex. my friend has only just asked her mum about sex as she has just entered her first sexual relationship aged 20!! she has said that most of the stuff she knows about sex has come from myself and other friends because school and her parents have let her down! MORE NEEDS TO BE DONE IN SCHOOLS!!!! i think we should all go DUTCH!!!!!!!
Colin, 46
For the record I am 46 y/old male, long since separated and have a loving 23 y/old son, who thankfully has come out this side of his teens a very decent human being.
I accidentally stumbled upon your documentary ‘Let's talk Sex’ this morning as I was channel hopping – but I will make sure I watch tomorrow's episode.
I found the show extremely interesting and found myself jumping out of my chair thinking "come on Davina, get a campaign going" – I only wish Davina could authoritatively stamp her mark on the government in much the same way as celebrity chef Jamie Oliver did with school dinners.
I was very impressed with the documentary and you can see why the Dutch have so much a better record around teenage sex and pregnancy than we do in the UK. How anyone could not be converted into their way of teaching is beyond comprehension as it made so much sense in what they have achieved and the sensitive, yet highly informative way in which it is presented.
I think all attendees in the filming were convinced this is the way forward for the UK, with one teacher having reservations regarding, not so much the practice of the Dutch way, but more so the UK’s perceived general reaction in accepting such a radical change.
The lady parent at the end of the today’s filming, was typical in her reaction and it was a very short sighted point of view indeed, although I’m not sure what was said or shown to her in order to get that reaction. Surely if she had seen the documentary, she should have been saying how it could make her life so much easier not having to perform the teaching experience herself.... and let's face it, how many parents in today’s society have teaching experience anyway OR are even able to communicate with their children at that level.
The show made 2 very good points
1) Davina was spot on when she picked up on the fact that, with all this knowledge in place, the decision to have sex, was a conscious decision made by the individuals and that they were subconsciously accepting full responsibility for their actions and that is was NOT the responsibility of someone else.
2) Sex, if not taught properly, is such a taboo subject and clearly the UK teenagers experiment with the taboo subject in much the same way as the temptation to look behind a locked door. The openness highlighted in the documentary takes away the mystical element of sex, which, along with the detailed information they teach, then I can well understand why the average age for consent is 16/17.
I'm not sure what the way forward is with our UK parents, but I would love to see the DVD of the documentary imposed for parental viewing, even if it was as tightly controlled as Council Tax payments :)
Well done to the Dutch for their achieved standards of sex education and many thanks to you for producing an informative view on such a tentative subject
Louise, 16
I am 16 and i'm off ill today, and caught some of the program. I thought it was really good how the adults in Holland are completely open about sex and how to teach it. Teaching to children of younger ages is fantastic as they aren't at hormonal puberty stages and so take it seriously which means when they do become teenagers they will act maturely and responsibly with the knowledge they have been given. I have read the other commments and i find it especially interesting about the Catholic schools. Going to one myself i empathise that we aren't taught enough and we rely on the internet, friends and awkward situations to teach us about sex. I really hope we can become more like Holland, and that the next generation will benefit from a more detailed and prominent sex education.
Jane 29, London
Just watched Davina's programme. Today's was the best yet, sex education in Holland is a revelation. Education is obviously the key to resolving many of our problems in the UK. I went to a Catholic Girls school, we all thought we knew everything and actually knew nothing...
The schools and government must take responsibility for EDUCATING. Once the information, support and resources are in place the responsibility shifts onto the fully aware and educated teenager who, having received the 'Double Dutch' and 'Love and Respect' messages, is far more likely to have a safe and enjoyable sex life!
I'm not a parent, yet, but I'd fully support this campaign now and in the future. Good luck!
Claire, 30
I have just finished watching today's program... Lord! I grabbed a video and recorded the show. We have needed this kind of enlightenment & imformation for years. As a parent I am baffled as to how to teach them about the emotions involved in sexual relationships. I personally lost my virginity at the age of thirteen (the age of my eldest child now) who I gave birth to at the age of 16! Now two marriages & four children later I hope that they will learn from my mistakes, the problem is they are being taught all the wrong lessons from ME. I will be following the series with great interest as to what I can do to help not just my children but how to approach their schools about this subject.
Laura, 15, Scotland
after watching "Let's Talk Sex" my eyes really opened! schools really should teach sex education at a younger age. i didn't know anything about it, lots of my friends at the age of 13–14 where already having sex, and as all teenagers i was wondering what was the big deal, what's sex?
Well at the young age of 13 i found out! i was going out with my boyfriend for 6 months and it happened! and it wasn't at all what i expected, however 2 years on i'm scared i might be pregnant with my recent partner and i really don't know what to do! i just wish there were people that i could talk to that wouldn't judge me, i'm too scared to go get a pregnancy test and i don't know how to go around getting one. If only they told us this information in school! i would know what to do now i'm stuck and i really am scared!
Nicola
What a great programme!!! it just shows how ignorant some people are about their attitude about teenage sex and pregnancy. I remember in my days at school, i think we had one lesson. The dutch have got things so right haven't they. We have a ten year old boy and a five year old girl, and are trying for our third child. Our ten year old knows, what i think is a lot more than the average ten year old, we have openly discussed about sex even before we decided to try for another child, the opportunity came up when he had to be circumcised a year ago, so it felt right for us to talk to him about things. He knows he can come to us at any time to talk about anything. I personally think the earlier you talk to them the better, then they will know their own bodies and can talk openly about what's happening to them in their teens.
Mary, Surrey
Bravo Davina and channel 4 for showing Britain the way. As a mother of two sons aged 11 and 5 I feel strongly that they be shown the way to achieve healthy views on safe sex, and not feel as though it is a subject to be embarrassed or ashamed of. I love the way the Dutch discuss all aspects of sex and relationships (something which seems to be missed out in sex education in Britain, although highly important I'd say). My older son started sex education this year, although knew an awful lot already as we have always encouraged him to be as open with us as he likes, and in return we be as honest with him as possible. He already knew exactly what The Pill is for and how important Double Dutch (I love that saying!) is. Living in the world we live in today isn't it better they learn about sex from parents and educated people than anywhere else. (And they will you know, there's no hiding from it.) Bring it on I say, it can only make things better.
Karen, 33
well done Davina and Channel 4. (and the dutch government). i have a 6 year old daughter and a three year old son and i would be thrilled if they recieved the same high quality sex ed as the lucky children in Holland do. this morning's progrmme was the best thing I have seen on TV in a long time. If Channel 4 (or anyone else) could inform me on how to become a sex educator Dutch style I would be most grateful. We have to do something to stop our babies having babies.
Danielle
I watched with bated breath as i felt very let down when i was at school and when we did recieve sex education i was in year 10 and for a lot of the class it was too little too late, the majority were already having sex and when i left school i met up with two of that class a year on and they both had two children each!! at the time one was only days old. the people who are against a more informative lesson earlier on in their education are living in denial. the opinion that it's undermining people as parents is ridiculous, i would dearly love the back-up of the teachers and medical staff to give my children the best options and to remove this mistery about sex. it's like the forbidden fruit it's too tempting to young people they jump in head first without realising or understanding what they are doing and then it's all too late.
being a prude about a natural bodly function is totally ridiculous. sex is not dirty it's not sinful it's natural. could you imagine if the same predjudice was there regarding going to the toilet!! The whole subject of sex has become a disgusting and rude, the pope was even quoted in saying that sex in a loving relationship is one of the most beautiful things in man's life. so if the pope is saying sex in a loving relationship is good and natural i think we need to seriously look at our opinions toward sex. the human race needs sex to grow, but the role of parent is a difficult one and you need to be mentally ready for that responsability so it's vital that education is there to allow children to be children and know when they are ready for the prospect of sex and parenthood themselves, that it's their responsability. you must not let ignorance and embarrassment destroy your child's future. sex has never been wrong or dirty and i think the british people are going to have a hard time dealing with that, generations of hiding it in the broom cupboard have hurt our children badly.
wake up UK smell the coffee, bite the big bits back stop letting your own embarrassment destroy their futures. it's our role as parents to teach and if we find a subject difficult to seek guidence and not make the problem worse by ignoring it
Sarah, 22
I am 22 and had my daughter when i was 17. I was only with my boyfriend for 8months when i got pregnant. We never had sex until we were together 4months but even when we did we used no contraception. When i was at school i was only told about what happens when the egg and sperm meet and about womens bodies e.g. periods. I have just watched the programme and can i just say Davina at last someone with sense. I agree 100% with you. When i got pregnant i had just finished my GCSEs and beginning my A-levels. I thought my life was over. But i stuck at it and went back to school when my daughter was 8weeks old and got my 3 A-levels and now studying a HND Business. I see myself as lucky as i have my head screwed on and know what i want. Myself and my partner are still together and are happy as a family. But there are many young girls who do not know what it entails. They need to be set straight. I think if i had have i would be finishing university instead of just starting. Please do not give up the fight. you have my support all the way!!
Susan, Swindon
It is my honest opinion that safe sex education should begin at a much earlier age than currently. I am a mother of 4, one of my daughters is 10 and I know that she has many questions about how her body is changing and about periods. some girls in her class have already started their periods and are having to deal with the emotions that come with these. Apart from what I have told her the only education is acquired from listening to her friends and their experiences. I am lucky as she talks openly to me and asks me many questions. I know that this isn't always the case with many children. I enquired when they start and the content of Sex Education at school and found that they receive the same sex education as I did when I was at school (30 years ago!). We as a society know that children are growing up faster than we did so why are we not tailoring their education appropriately?
Just because we teach sex education to children does not mean that they will want sex, we teach them geography but not all want to travel the world! It is all about having choices and being allowed to make informed decisions.
We need to look into improving sex education before it becomes too late. If teenagers are having babies at an increasing rate than what is the long term effect, socially and economically for this country?
I appreciate that we all want to keep our children young and innocent as long as possible and ideally children would never have sex until they are adults (and then indeed always operate safe sex) and never drink until they are 18 or over and never take drugs but sadly this isn't a realistic view but giving all children sensible and sensitive education is within our reach. We are responsible for our children and their education. we wouldn't send our children to climb a mountain without safety advice but we let them go out into the world without the knowledge they need. It's easy to say that they will learn from their mistakes but that's a harsh lesson for a 16 year old to learn whilst pushing a pram or worse (STD are out there they are not just scare stories.) IMPROVE SEX EDUCATION NOW
Louise
I am one hundred % behind Davina.
My memories of sex education at school are very basic, like seperate lessons for girls and boys. My education was what you learnt from your friends, which is not always right! I have two daughters. One of which is 12. She goes to the same secondary school as I did and I don't think much has changed regards sex. I have tried to talk to her about sex, but she tells me to shut up. I hope what Davina is trying to do will bring change, as it is so greatly needed in this country. Well done!
Kelly, 24
I've just watched the program about sex ed in Holland and, though I was shocked at first about how explicit the 13yr old sex ed was, I thought it was great. If you start them younger talking about these things, and knowing these things, then it won't be such a joke to them like it was to everyone I knew when I was doing sex ed in mid senior school. That they talk about love and relationships in infants and junior school is all the better, they'll just grow up taking the knowledge for granted.
Nell, 29
I had my first child at 16 and my second at 19. There were many events that led to cause my early pregnancies but the effect is that i am STILL trying to educate myself after not completing it when i was young. I am living off benefits that don't allow for ANY luxuries, i voluteer full time to give myself some self-worth and i have practically missed out on my youth. The father of my children left right at the start and i have had no other support. I would die for my children, but i wouldn't want anyone going through what i have.
Unfortunately as the show said, it is the attitude of our country that needs to be addressed, more openness in our homes and schools, so that more detailed sex education will be accepted. My son is 9 and wants to know all about why his penis becomes erect. I feel this is the age sex ed should begin.
Moya
Fantastic programme. Much more information about the Dutch approach is what we need, and then for it to be implemented countrywide, throughout the age groups. Why not start a campaign at channel 4 to get the government to implement it. I know that you would receive tremendous support, or is there a campaign we can join already?
De, 26, Buckinghamshire
I am a new mum, I have a 9 month old little girl and I love her but I would not have wanted her any younger. being a parent is really hard and no matter what age you are but when you're a teenager it must be so much harder. I would not have been able to do the things that I have done if I had a baby in my teens and missed out on all those things that you do when you're that age. I think that we should teach sex education just as the Dutch do and from the age that they teach it at but it should not just end at school we should be more open with our children. When I went to school the only sex education that we had was one lesson which was a video and it was rubbish. I am all for a new way to teach sex education and starting it from a young age. Davina, you go girl D
Chloe, 17
I think the state of sex education in schools is disgusting. I am a 17 year old girl and thankfully have had good sex education, though from the local youth club not at school. At primary school i had one, half hour lesson of sex education which just said that women get pregnant from men's sperm, you can take contraception and showed us pictures of the different methods and told us their name but with no explanation and that was it. I went through the whole of my secondary school education with no sex education at all. Luckily i was told in depth about STIs/STDs, contraception and making decisions about sex at my local youth club but not all kids are that lucky. I have met girls that have said stupid things like wearing a tampon while having sex stops you from getting pregnant, you can't get pregnant when you are on/off you period, and then issues with periods, that tampons make you go blind if you wear them for more than half an hour and that they stop you from having kids ... the list goes on. It really saddens me to think that these young girls and boys don't know the facts and end up making bad choices and ruining their lives just because the education system and parents feel embarrassed or think their kids need to be "protected". surely it's better to have a child that knows all the facts and is able to make the right choices?! the government needs to put a proper sex education system in place that teaches kids from a young age to stop all this. they are failing whole generations of young people, it has to change now!
Donna, 20
I only remember two sex education lessons at school; one in year 6, a video explaining the different sexual organs and the second was in year 10 and we were shown the different methods of contraception and were told briefly about STIs and prevention. I didn't feel we were taught enough but there was nothing else the school would do. There were girls in my year group and below who were already pregnant or had children by the time the contraception lesson was shown so it is too little too late. I had a pregnancy scare at 15 and was terrified, no-one had told me what the mental effects would be or what I could do if I had been pregnant. Sex ed really needs to be improved and soon as the statistics of teenage pregnancy are continuing to rise. What can we do to stop this?
Lyn, 42
Dear Channel 4 and Davina, How refreshing to see a no nonsense approach being taken towards sex education at school, it's a pity it takes a tv programme and tv presenter to do it when the Government should take this in full responsibility for their inadequate guidance towards our children. I am a mother of an 11 year old and my biggest fear apart from drugs is teenage pregnancy. I try to be open, but obviously my daughter has slight embarrassment mum talks about sex, especially as her friends' parents dont, but she knows about condoms, pill, injections, coil etc, and that a loving relationship is what makes sex enjoyable, but she also knows I don't give her permission for sexual activity, it will be her responsibility eventually. I would love to get a video appropriate to the different stages of education at different ages! good luck and keep up the good work, we cannot as a country continue in the way we have, there is nothing proud to be British in that!!! Tony blair and future prime ministers please take NOTE!!!!! GET YOUR SCHOOLS SORTED.
Jaki, 30
some teenage girls seem to see it as if they get pregnant it will be so cool they wont have to work they can dress the baby and parade it like a dolly and have everyone fussing over them and the baby.... Wrong... having a baby is nothing like that as most of us who have kids know.
we definitely need to educate our children better and before they start having sexual relations as what's the point in teaching them about something they are already doing.
im 30 yrs old and didn't have sexual relations till i was 18. i put this down to good education that my mum taught me at an early age about contraception, diseases, pregnancy and bringing up children etc and i shall be doing the same and teaching my 3 children at an early age. children would definitely be better off if they were educated properly in all the facts, if schools and parents taught the children about sex and relations then maybe we wouldn't have the problems of teen pregnancies instead of moaning about it and then brushing it under the carpet.