Kelp collector
Getting up at low tide can be bracing, especially when the tide's out at 3am. For this job, you'll be a healthy person living by the seaside in Scotland or Ireland, who wants to get on in life and has plenty of enthusiasm. We're looking for kelp collectors to venture out and drag up the stinking slimy seaweed at low tides.
Collect 20 tons of the stuff and it can be boiled down to make one ton of soda, the magical chemical that will keep the linen tablecloths underneath all that Christmas fare whiter than white.
Of course, this isn't really just a Christmas job. Soda can be harvested throughout the year from the smelly sea plants, but your boom time will be Christmas, when plenty of part-time seasonal workers will be needed.
