Medieval attitudes towards sex and the sexes are steeped in religious hypocrisy. Prostitutes are refused burial on consecrated ground, yet the bishop of Winchester receives rent from brothels in the red-light district of Southwark, just outside the City of London's walls.

Battle of the sexes

It is a particularly confusing time to be a woman. On the one hand, motherhood is regarded as a woman's most wonderful gift. On the other, young women are encouraged by the Church to become nuns because virginity is the ideal state, with marriage a poor second. A priest in the 1200s points out the advantages of a religious life and gives a description of pregnancy: 'Your pink, healthy face will become thin, and turn sickly green like grass.'

Men are confused, too. The Church teaches that women's sexuality is morally inferior and downright dangerous – they are 'the gateway to hell', according to one scholar – yet reams of chivalrous poetry point out that women are to be respected and admired for their beauty and gentleness.

Marriage and family

Among the general population, marriages usually take place when the couples are in their late 20s, after the man has secured an income. Parental consent is usually sought but isn't essential. Most marriages take place in church but it isn't stipulated in law: often stating your marriage vows in front of witnesses is sufficient. The minimum age for marriage under Church and common law is 12 for girls and 14 for boys. But nobles operate under a different set of rules.

Betrothals, arranged by the parents, regularly occur during infancy. Edward II's daughter Joan is married to Prince David of Scotland in 1328 when she is seven and he is four. Princess Isabella of France marries Richard II in 1396 when she is seven, although she has the opportunity to change her mind later.

Lady Margaret Beaufort is 13 when she gives birth to the future Henry VII in 1457. But in 1414, a Welsh couple are sent to Henry V as a 'marvel' because they have had a baby: allegedly, she is seven and he is nine.

Sex outside marriage is deemed very sinful by the Church, but it goes on all the same. Lords of the manor even make a profit from it. They impose fines on village women for fornication and for bearing illegitimate children. At Wakefield manor in 1316, seven female villeins are fined for 'lechery'.

The average family size for nobles is four surviving children. For ordinary people, it is two.

See also Hazards.

Women

In 1180, a lawyer states that 'every married woman is a sort of infant'. Married women have few rights. Church law permits men to beat their wives for laziness or disobedience, although not harshly. When a woman marries, her goods automatically become her husband's property for as long as he lives. Divorce for women is almost impossible, but men can throw their wives out of the house with impunity for being unfaithful. Words such as 'effeminate', 'womanish' and 'feminine' are used against men as terms of abuse. Edward II and his courtiers are attacked for their effeminacy.

Marriage for aristocratic women is frequently a business deal. Love between the partners is not seen as important: marriage are made to forge territorial alliances or enrich a family's fortunes.

Before Magna Carta puts a stop to it, the king has the right to sell off widowed noble women to the highest bidder. There are even cases of kidnappings so that the king can collect his fee. Once this practice is ended, rich widows enjoy the rare privilege of managing their estates and spending their money as they see fit. This is as equal to men as women ever get.

The countess Hawisa, who marries the earl of Essex in 1180, is described by a monastic chronicler – presumably as a compliment – as 'almost a man to whom nothing masculine is lacking save virility'.

Older noble women sometimes retire to nunneries, as does Eleanor of Aquitaine at the age of 79. Nuns are the best-educated women in the country. A woman who doesn't fancy the rules and regulations of convent life can choose to become an anchoress, which involves being closeted in a house with little but prayers and a spot of teaching to occupy the mind.

Women cannot take part in government or the law and they cannot attend university. Unmarried poor women usually seek work as servants in big houses from the age of 14, where they earn a wage and their keep. It is a good place to meet future husbands.

Married women have few employment options, particularly in rural areas. Some earn a little by weaving or needlework, but most of the openings are for street-sellers, barmaids, shop assistants or market traders. 'A woman will never give up the profit from a single crumb,' says one writer. Many women have no option but to turn to prostitution.

Prostitution

Officially sanctioned brothels (or 'stews') exist in places such as Sandwich in Kent, Southwark across the Thames from the City of London and the aptly named Cock Lane at Smithfield in London.

In Southwark, prostitutes are referred to as 'Winchester geese' because the brothels are situated in the London see of the bishop of Winchester, who collects rents from them. The rules state that the stewholders must be men, that the women must stay with a client all night in order to avoid 'night-walking', and that they must not lodge at the brothel. Illegal stews also exist, often run by women.

In 1384, the Common Council of London states that any prostitute found guilty of living outside the designated area of Cock Lane will be taken from prison in a striped hood, carrying a white wand, and accompanied by minstrels to a pillory at Aldgate, where her offence will be publicly proclaimed. Then she will be escorted back through the city to Cock Lane.

Men found guilty of procuring a prostitute are given an unfortunate haircut, have their beards shaved off and are made to stand in a pillory until the mayor says they can go home.

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