Page 2 of 3 Ain't Misbehavin'

Reward points

Praise isn't the only way to reward good behaviour, although it is one of the most effective. You don't always have to use words of praise. A hug, kiss, a clap or a big pat on the back can all be used to reward good behaviour. Other rewards can include privileges, such as being allowed to watch a particular TV programme, choosing what to have for pudding, having a friend for tea, food treats, or even money.

Remember your child needs to know what you are praising so always link your words to their actions. For example: 'You did really well to sit still so the doctor could look in your ear.'

A trip to the park can be an appropriate reward for a young child's good behaviour.

Rewards are most potent when they appeal to the child so take into account your child's age, temperament, place in the family when thinking of suitable rewards. It's no good rewarding a shy child with the promise of being allowed to go to a party any more than it is promising a raving extrovert with a quiet time alone at home.

Kids behaving badly

The best way to deal with bad behaviour is not to reward it. It's often possible to pre-empt tantrums and bad behaviour by being prepared. For example, if your child is easily over-excited, planning in advance to leave an over-stimulating situation (such as visiting relatives or a birthday party) before it all gets too much, can be a good tactic.

By the same token that incentives help encourage good behaviour, sanctions can discourage bad. The rule is to warn the child verbally and then if they still continue to misbehave to apply the sanction. Sanctions may include taking away privileges such as having a friend to stay, doing something they enjoy or even a fine.

One approach is to encourage parents to start each day by promising their children a pound if they follow the rules. The parent then docks a penny for each incident of bad behaviour, such as shouting, swearing or refusing to do something they have been asked to do. At the end of the day you give them what they have earned by behaving well. Supernanny applies the same principle to younger children by confiscating a toy from the toy box for naughtiness.



Please note: the Little Darlings book is not written by Jo Frost. « Previous page | Next page »