adoption

by Kendra Inman

adoption | help and info | real life stories

The truth about adoption is frequently buried under a mountain of myths and half-truths. However, the process is not just about sending abandoned children to live with well-meaning couples. It is a challenging – though often rewarding – experience for all concerned.

the facts

So what is the truth about adoption? Ill-informed media coverage has painted a picture of a multitude of babes in care kept from loving adoptive parents by loony councils. The true picture is much more complex. The number of babies and little children available for adoption is actually relatively small. In England and Wales, for example, there were 61,100 children in care in 2004, but nearly 40 per cent of them eventually return to live with their own families.

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Professionals in this sector say that critics of the system prefer to overlook the facts about adoption. Until the 1970s, it was socially unacceptable for a single woman to have a child, and thousands of women were encouraged to 'give up' their newborn babies for adoption.

Today, lone parenthood carries much less stigma and only a small proportion of children adopted from care are babies. Of the 3,700 children adopted in England and Wales in 2004, only 219 were aged under one. The average age at adoption was 4 years and 5 months and this has changed little in the last five years. There is also evidence that adoption is not seen as a realistic option for young women today. Research carried out on teen pregnancies for the government's Social Exclusion Unit in 1999 found that adoption was not presented to them as an option when they were counselled about their pregnancy.

No woman decides to give a baby up for adoption lightly. They will have spent weeks agonising over whether they are making the right decision for themselves and their child. Babies cannot be adopted until six weeks after their birth. This 'cooling off' period is to allow the mother to be absolutely sure that they are making the right decision.

adoption today

These days most potentially adoptable children are older, some have special needs including disabilities, and still others are part of groups of siblings who ideally should be kept together. The fact that these children have not been able to remain with their families often means that they have suffered serious abuse and neglect and, as a result, are very needy and demanding.

Adoption did fall out of fashion with councils during the 1980s when the emphasis was on keeping families together – in some cases, inappropriately. In recent times, councils have also been condemned for ruling out some parents on grounds of 'political correctness' – in other words, because they smoked, were overweight or were of a different racial or cultural background to the children.

Some local authorities are better at finding new homes for children than others – the annual adoption rate among them varies between 0.5% and 10.5% of children in their care. Many social work departments are under-resourced and social workers overworked, and the time and energies that ideally should have been put into finding children permanent new homes have not been available.

The adoption statistics for England show how much practice has changed – in 2004, there were 3,700 adoptions, compared with 20,000 in 1970. Now there is a consensus that more children could and should be adopted. The government has made it clear that more children in care should be available for adoption and the process should be speeded up.

new adoption law

The government has overhauled adoption law in England and Wales, making much needed changes. The Adoption and Children Act 2002 offers a new framework for adopting in the UK and overseas. Some parts of the Act, including new restrictions on adoption from overseas, came into action during 2003 and 2004 and the rest will be implemented in December 2005. Ministers hope that the changes will encourage more people to come forward and adopt.

When new parts of the Act came into fruition in 2003, Margaret Hodge, the minister for Children, Young People and Families, emphasised the need for adoptive families and stressed that she hoped the new regulations would make the process easier:

'Children need permanent and loving families. The number of children adopted from care has increased by almost 25 per cent in the last two years. This is excellent progress, but there's still a long way to go and we must continue to rise to the challenge ahead. Considering adoption is a big step, but bringing a child of any age into a caring loving family can be a hugely rewarding experience. I hope more people will think about doing it.'

The Act:

• allows unmarried couples to be able to apply to adopt a child jointly, after they have been subjected to the same rigorous assessment procedures that will apply to married and single people wishing to adopt
• stops people wishing to adopt from overseas avoiding the proper assessment and approval procedures
• encourages more people to adopt children in care by ensuring they have the support they need
• has established an independent review system for potential adopters that feel they have been turned down unfairly
• includes changes to allow courts to set timetables to cut delays in adoption court cases.

When the final part of the legislation comes in at the end of December 2005, same-sex couples will be able to apply jointly for adoption in England and Wales. Like other couples, they'll have to demonstrate that their partnership is an 'enduring family relationship'.

In April 2001, the Scottish Parliament announced a review of adoption services with similar aims to the England and Wales review. Over the last 10 years, the number of approved adoption applications in Scotland has halved, from 900 per year to 450. The new Scottish Adoption Bill is still being finalised, but it's hoped that it will become active in 2006. The Bill will:

• modernise and improve the legal framework for adoption
• create greater long-term stability and permanence for children, so they feel they belong to a family
• improve the procedures, services and support for adoptive parents
• help give every child the best start in life and ensure the most vulnerable children have the security and protection they need
• allow joint adoption by unmarried couples, including same-sex couples.

step-parent adoptions

Husbands or wives can apply to adopt their partner's children from a previous relationship. The child's other parent who has parental responsibility must give permission. In exceptional cases the courts can decide their consent is not needed. In practice the courts are often reluctant to make adoption orders in favour of a step-parent and parent as it is generally viewed that maintaining links with both parents will be important for a child's self esteem – and adoption will cut all the ties with the other parent. Adults can also apply to adopt relatives such as nieces or nephews under 18 years old although again these applications are very rare. Any application to adopt a child must be shown to be in the child's best interests.

is it goodbye for ever?

Adoption orders sever all legal ties with the birth family and confer parental rights and responsibilities on the adoptive family. The birth parents no longer have a legal right over the child and they are not entitled to claim him or her back. However, arrangements can be made to allow adoptees to maintain contact with siblings and other relatives from their birth families. Contact registers allow adopted people and their relatives to record their interest in making contact when the child grows up. The letterbox system allows adoptive parents to share photographs and information about the child throughout their childhood.

Young people who have been adopted have the right to seek their birth parents when they reach 18.

inter-country adoption

Throughout the 1990s, the adoption of children from countries such as Romania and China came under the scrutiny of the media. The plight of the children, abandoned in under-resourced orphanages and other institutions, moved many people to try and adopt.

There was widespread concern among professionals that families desperate for a child were bypassing proper procedures and adopting without being properly approved. On the other hand, families argued that adopting from overseas was needlessly complicated and the authorities were being deliberately obstructive. These concerns eventually led to the Adoption Inter-Country Aspects Act 1999 (which was implemented in 2002) and other international agreements about how overseas adoptions should proceed. Now people who adopt children from abroad without first being given the go-ahead by UK authorities face imprisonment.

About 300 children each year are adopted by UK families from overseas. Under the current system, people can adopt from abroad as long as it is thought to be in the child's best interest. Potential adopters are assessed in the same way as domestic adopters. However, unlike assessments for adoptions within the UK, the local authorities or agencies carrying out the assessments for overseas adoptions charge varying amounts for the service. The revised Inter-Country Adoption Aspects Act helps to ensure that children being adopted haven't been abducted or sold to child traffickers and some countries are now subject to special restrictions.

Adopting from abroad can be an expensive and frustrating business. In addition, the children may have health or emotional problems that will only emerge as they grow up. But even with all the difficulties, overseas adoption can still be the answer for children who have no chance of family life in their own countries – and there are successful families to prove it!

unplanned pregnancy

Once a woman decides that adoption is the way forward, she'll be visited by a specialist social worker from the social services department or adoption agency.

Brook advisory centres have this advice for pregnant women considering adoption: If you decide on adoption you need to arrange antenatal care for yourself and your baby as soon as possible. Contact social services for advice on what help and support you will need throughout the pregnancy. They will also put you in contact with an adoption agency.

If you have strong feelings about what kind of family you would like to adopt your baby, discuss these with the adoption agency. You can involve the father but you do not need to tell anyone who the father is if you don't want to. If you decide to keep the baby when it is born there will be no pressure on you to give it up for adoption.

Of course adoption is only one option to think about when facing an unplanned pregnancy. Many women decide to keep the baby and some consider abortion.

dads' rights

When it comes to having a baby adopted, fathers have fairly limited rights in law, although if their names are on the child's birth certificate or they live with the mother this will help to strengthen their rights. To get their names on the register, they would need to jointly register the child's birth with the mother.

Adoption panels will make every effort to contact the child's father and take their feelings into account before giving an adoption the go-ahead, says Kirsty Clegg from Talk Adoption, the national helpline for young people affected by adoption.

Emma Charvet of the British Agencies of Fostering and Adoption says, 'social workers have a responsibility to put the needs of the child first. While the social worker should encourage the mother to consult the father, if she doesn't want to there is little she can do about it.'

'They would ask for the father's name and would try and track him down. Of course he could refuse to speak to them and deny paternity. This could then be recorded on the adoption file which the child will have access to when they're older.'

Dads can also apply to the court which is dealing with the adoption application to try to prevent it going ahead – and if a dad has realistic and well thought through proposals to look after his own child and become the child's permanent main carer, then the courts will have to consider this.

Fathers have gone to the courts to prevent the mother terminating the pregnancy but so far none have been successful in the UK. Experts predict more such challenges under the new Human Rights Act.

(November 2001, updated October 2005)

Read on for details of relevant organisations, websites and reading. Or follow this link to read two real life adoption stories.