Dispatches - Battle Scarred - Help and Support
Life in the Armed Forces places unique pressure on Britain's servicemen and women and their families. Routine Service life, with its regular moves and postings and all the accompanying uncertainty, takes its own toll on relationships. However, during periods of conflict and operational deployment, ordinary stresses and strains are amplified. The tempo and intensity of operations in Afghanistan and Iraq have inevitably had a consequence, both for those who serve on the frontline and for those they leave behind.
It is a testament to the determined, focussed and resourceful approach of Forces families that so many marriages remain intact under the most intense pressure. Divorce rates within the Army, for example, appear not to have increased during the last 10 years; on average, 2.25% of married personnel have got divorced each year.
Sadly, many relationships do not survive the pressure of life in the Armed Forces and, in particular, the demands of regular operational deployments. Many women staying in the 'Stepping Stone Homes' run by Service charity SSAFA Forces Help to provide accommodation for separated Service and ex-Service women, report changes in the behaviour of their husband or partner on returning from a tour of duty.
Some blame changes in temperament and a loss of interest in family life for marital breakdown while in other cases it is aggressive behaviour and domestic violence. "Active service definitely had an impact on him," says one resident. "He was quite changed on his return and became bad-tempered and aggressive." Another mum-of-two feels her husband's violent behaviour towards her was a direct result of his operational deployments. In a 24 month period he had spent 18 months away on operations.
SSAFA's Confidential Support Line has also seen an increasing number of calls relating to social welfare issues including relationships. The support line, which is available every day of the year, operates independently of the military chain-of-command to provide a listening and advisory service for both Serving personnel and their families and former members of the Armed Forces. In 2008 almost 40 per cent of the calls received related to social welfare issues. It is clear that operational tours have directly and indirectly affected both partner and parent / child relationships.
It is also clear that relationship breakdowns are often the result of a number of contributory factors. When a serviceman or woman leaves the Forces, additional pressures come into play, sometimes compounding problems that already exist. The Confidential Support Lines regularly receives calls regarding debt and money worries, housing concerns and health problems.
In conjunction with other Service charities, SSAFA Forces Help provides practical support and assistance to members of the Armed Forces and their families after they have left. Increasingly, those who need this support are younger (in 2008, SSAFA assisted nearly 7000 ex-Servicemen and women in their 20s, 30, and 40s). Many also have far more complex, inter-related problems than their predecessors, including mental health issues and severe financial difficulties. The breakdown of a relationship is often the inevitable consequence.
To find out more about how SSAFA Forces Help can help you or someone you know, call 020 7403 8783 or visit www.ssafa.org.uk
To contact the Confidential Support Line call 0800 731 4880
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