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Let the destruction commence! |
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Poop Patrol
Day 55, 18:00
Nush and Ray have spent some quality time together in the garden...indulging in a scintillating conversation about chicken poo.
Apparently it isn't possible for two housemates to carry out the disgusting chore of de-pooping the garden without going into utterly unnecessary and gratuitous descriptions of each and every dollop of dung they come across.
A man with a mission, Ray took control of the hose, and hulked around the garden ominously, looking for patches of dung he could obliterate.
Nush, meanwhile, walked two steps in front of Ray, pointing out fresh (and in some cases stale) piles for Ray to destroy.
"Wait till you see this one!" Nush giggled excitedly as she stumbled across a particularly large lump. "Break it up into pieces!" she commanded her obliging waste-patrol partner.
"Release the fury!" Ray replied strangely, as he blasted the offending turd.
Once the deadliest dollop had been annihilated, there was no stopping the poo-obsessed pair.
Displaying an alarming talent for being able to differentiate between random piles of chicken plop, Nush guided her hit man around the garden pointing and yelling at a furious pace...
"Get the miniature nuggets!...There's a fly on that one!...a fresh one!...A nice, firm, round one!...The one with the bit of white!...Lord, there's polystyrene in that one!...This one's splattered!...A biggy in the corner!...Looks about a day old!"
Ray was rather less descriptive in his observations, opting for a simple "dirty f*****s" to express his views on the feathered housemates.
And perhaps he had the right idea, for all the hunting appeared to have taken its toll on baby Nushy.
"I've gone off the idea of chickens," she confessed to her pal.
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Listen to the latest news from the House. Call the Big Brother Audioline on 09068 22 25 25. Calls cost 60p per minute. Mobile costs may vary.
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