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Jon's PR Lecture
Day 57, 21:55
Just minutes after the eviction was announced, Jon cornered Nush in the girls' bedroom to give her the lowdown on how to deal with the press.
Jon followed her in as she started dolling herself up ready for her release. Sitting down on the bed, Jon's face was deadly serious as he got something off his chest.
"First off," he began, "I have to tell you something. You have to take it seriously. I cannot win this."
"That's a shame," she replied.
"I'm just in here to keep you company," he explained. But that was just the beginning. "There's a few things I've learnt about the media in the last few weeks. You only have a week left before the end of the show and you have to make the most of it."
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He went on to explain the tough decisions that lay ahead of her in the coming days. "The decision you have to make at 9 o'clock tomorrow morning is whether you want to sell your story to the national press."
In an utterly bizarre and never-before seen moment a second later, he was using his finger to draw on her hand the amounts that various different evicted housemates had made by selling their stories.
"In thousands, Anouska got this," he began, "and Sissy got this." Throughout all of this, Nush had the look of a startled rabbit in the headlights.
Jon then got down to the nitty-gritty of life as a celebrity. "Don't be a celebrity ligger," he advised. "Don't go to envelope openings. Be careful of your agent. Listen to advice in the industry."
His last words were of a personal nature, however. "You mother loves you very much," he told her, and she wants to talk to you first." He then had to reassure her that everything was OK, but that her mother just wanted to speak to her before anyone else did.
As if to signal that he was revealing too much, Big Brother summoned him to the Diary room. But Jon was indignant. "I'm not ready yet," he said in defiance, before telling the new evictee: "You've got nothing to worry about. Enjoy it."
And no doubt she will.
Listen to the latest news from the House. Call the Big Brother Audioline on 09068 22 25 25. Calls cost 60p per minute. Mobile costs may vary.
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