And I finished all my Christmas shopping days ago...
WELCOME the the Editor's Blog! Here you'll find the weeks comedy cream of the crop, including news, reviews, guest blogs, the mighty Caption Competition, the new Little Laughs and lots of goodies especially for you...
You may have noticed (if you have eyes) that it's getting closer to Christmas and it's getting a little festive here on 4Laughs. So this week I wish you happy stress-free Christmas shopping, the experience of finding the perfect gift for someone at a discount price and free samples of sherry and mince pies in every shop!
Let's get cracking with the lastest laugh out loud funnies from the forum...
Cliffit: "As she stared sadily around she pondered "why do mums come to iceland?"
CrookedWeasel: "After 10 minutes on the "EXTREME" Ice Blaster ride, she realised she wanted her money back."
I feel a bit mean this week only picking two. Oh well they 'were' the best two... Classic caption from Cliffit and I just cracked up at CookedWeasel's entry - great stuff!
Now, it's nearly Christmas, so can you tell me what the jumping Jesus is going on here..?
All entries for this week's Caption Comp should be posted in the Forum Thread 28 November Caption Comp.
The winner for this Caption Comp will appear in next Friday's Editor's Blog - 5 December. Good Luck!
Thought I'd throw it out there last week with the topic of ADVERTS. This is what I caught...
'GIVE A FEW BOB' review - by Bruceboy
Sorry to keep praising Mr Monkhouse, but dodgy gameshows aside he was a stand-up genius! And thanks to vintage footage and talented impersonators he returned from the grave with this classic ad for cancer research. A worthy cause, a technological feat, and proof Bob could still raise a giggle when dead ('Cancer kills more people than my wife's cooking'). Dubious taste for some, a miracle for me
This week I want your reviews of comedy PANEL SHOWS in the thread LITTLE LAUGHS - 28 November. You can review any PANEL SHOWS you've seen or heard (on TV, virals, websites, radio, press...) that you loved or hated - TELL ME, I NEED TO KNOW!
The reviews should be around 70 words - but don't over do it.
What would happen if one of the most important lists in the world was lost? Well Scottthedot give us an insight into what might be the consequences of this happening in his sketch SANTA LOSES IT. Ask yourself one question; are you naughty or nice..?
ELF: Um... Santa we have a problem.
SANTA: Yes, what is it?
ELF: Well you know how we keep that list...
SANTA: The naughty or nice list?
ELF: That's the one.
SANTA: What about it?
ELF: Well for a few years now we kept it in a computer database thingy. Very handy really and has saved a lot of confusion and er...
SANTA: What's your point?
ELF: We erm... lost the database.
SANTA: Noooooo. that's disastrous... we only have a few days to go! How did this happen?
ELF: Well, Alabaster Snowball burned it to CD so he could work on it from home and he er... left it on a train.
SANTA: He's a blithering idiot - I knew I should have let him go after his last appraisal. So what are we going to do now? We have no list of who is naughty and who is nice.
ELF: Well there is one possibility...
SANTA: Yes?
ELF: All we really need is a list of everyone who is naughty and then anyone who isn't on that list is by default 'nice'
SANTA: And where would you get such a list of naughty people?
ELF: Well, I've just downloaded this BNP membership off the internet...
END.
Who want's to review...
Brendon Burns:So I Suppose this is Offensive - DVD
Desmond's Series 1 - DVD
The World of Lee Evans - DVDx2
8 Out of 10 Cats: Claws Out - DVD
Rachel Johnson's Shire Hell- BOOK
If you want to review one of these lovelies, then simply email me with the name of the goodie you'd like with your name and address here 4Laughs@channel4.com
Anyway, that's all from me this week, but if you have any questions about any features in the blog or want to tell me about something you've done - just give me a shout at 4Laughs@channel4.com.
Cheerio
IT'S GETING CLOSER TO CHRISTMAS and I still can't drag myself to the shops.
I can't even go fast food shopping anymore, the last bastion of piss-easy retail therapy, as I seem to be met with utter incompetence every time. Upon asking for a white coffee at McDonalds yesterday I was told by the spotty 'yoof' that she couldn't give me white coffee so 'Would I take a black coffee with milk?' Jesus. I had to physically escort myself from the restaurant (restaurant - ha!) to prevent a Michael-Douglas-Falling-Down-moment from escalating.
I have a real coffee fixation in the winter. I'd turn tricks on the street for an extra shot in my latte if need be. The price doesn't even put me off, if anything it just encourages me. In fact, to the point that if I buy a coffee and it only costs a quid I instantly think what the fuck's up with this coffee? I become convinced the hint of cinnamon is marred by the pungent taste of scrotum.
Talking of scrotums, Timmy Mallett seems to be causing quite a storm on 'I'm a Celebrity' this week. If you thought the man who brought us the Wacawave was irritating enough to give you throat piles in the 80's, the 2008 incarnation makes 80's Mallett seem like Des Lynam. If I had a choice between eating deep-fried wallaby clit or talking to Timmy, I'd be asking for the mayonnaise.
With the bush-tucker trials and all the creepy crawlies, some of the images on that programme are positively disgusting. The last thing I want to look at when I'm eating my tea is Robert Kilroy Silk.
The TV Heckle of the Week Award goes to my nan who shouted loudly at the tube when Esther Rantzen appeared on screen.
"Esther Rantzen? She's the one who started all this child abuse..."
Tune in for more of Sam's mad ramblings next week...
Luckily a whole host of comics have decided to release DVD's just in the nick of time...
WELCOME the the Editor's Blog! Here you'll find the weeks comedy cream of the crop, including news, reviews, guest blogs, the mighty Caption Competition, the new Little Laughs and lots of goodies especially for you...
Without further ado, here's the words of wit from the forum...
NoHinHull: "The world wide effort to drive Alan Titchmarsh insane by stealing his plantpots and using them as hats got off to a great start."
Shirl The Whirl: "McDonalds new uniform was dropped after a fezability study."
CrookedWeasel: "The queue to get into the pyramids always took a phar-aohld time."
P Coltrane: "Although Jon had forgotten his belt, he was the only one to remember to poke the ceremonial red straw up his nose."
The lady is back with a cracking caption - top stuff Shirl! CrookedWeasel's offering is an oldie but a goodie and P Coltrane you made me re-check the picture to see what you were on about! It was a bit of a tricky one last week as Scottthedott kindly mentioned (I didn't do it on purpose, you know!)
But wait! What the..? Hey lady, what do you think you're doing? She obviously didn't see it through as this weeks image will show...
All entries for this week's Caption Comp should be posted in the Forum Thread 21 November Caption Comp.
The winner for this Caption Comp will appear in next Friday's Editor's Blog - 28 November. Good Luck!
There's my final post from me there if you fancy chaecking it out. Also, I'm chuffed to mention that Ive been asked back to judge the Magic IF Four Hour Film Challenge. If you're competing, I'll see you there - Good Luck!
Bit of an obscure request last week, but I've been doing so many interviews and no one has ever reviewed one on 4Laughs, I thought it was about time!
ROBIN WILLIAMS ON 'THE GRAHAM NORTON SHOW' review - by Seth Gecko
This was definitely one of the TV highlights of the year, so far - and a masterclass in how a chat show should be run... Admittedly, Williams rehashed much of the material he used at Prince Charles' 'We Are Most Amused' 60th birthday show, but there were also plenty of moments of off the cuff genius which grew out of Norton's conversational interviewing style and the participation of the audience... Graham wisely let Robin have a free rein, yet remained aware of when the time was right to pull him in and take things in a new direction, and it produced forty five minutes of what was, quite simply, comedy gold.
I had completely forgotten about chatshow interviews! I'm sad I missed this one as I really enjoy listening to Robin Williams - thanks for reviewing it Seth.
STEVE WRIGHT INTERVIEWS JIMMY CARR review - by Bruceboy
Following last Friday's excellent Comedy Police review of Jimmy I dug out this lovely interview from his 'Comedian' DVD. Publicising his 'Naked Jape' tome, the great man discusses the mechanics of jokes and - significantly - argues that even the strongest recognition-based routines are ultimately gagfests dressed up. Both choc-a-bloc with giggles and vital for practitioners of the art.
We have that book in the house - I'll read it now! Really nice reviews guys - thank you.
This week I want your reviews of comedy ADVERTS in the thread LITTLE LAUGHS - 21 November. You can review any ADVERTS you've seen, read or heard - serious or spoof (on TV, virals, websites, radio, press... ) that you loved or hated - TELL ME, I NEED TO KNOW!
The reviews should be around 70 words - but don't over do it.
Don't you hate it when you find out you've been lied to? Well if MC001's sketch COSTAS DAY is anything to by, you'll be more aware of it in the future. By the way, you smell nice today... and is that a new blouse?
TONY IS SITTING DRINKING A CUP OF COFFEE ALONE WITH HIS IPHONE. BEN ENTERS AND SITS DOWN OPPOSITE HIM. TONY LOOKS UP AND SIGHS.
BEN: Tony...
TONY: I thought you were Spanish...
BEN: I know... I'm sorry...
TONY: You told me you were a particle physicist...
BEN: Yes, but listen...
TONY: You said you owned a speed boat...
BEN: I did say that but...
TONY: You even said you loved me...
BEN: I did say all of those things, Tony yes... But I'm not gay and you see really... I was talking to her...
TONY: Her Who?
BEN: Your feminine side...
TONY: I don't have one...
BEN: You do... stand up and turn round...
TONY: No!
BEN: Do it!
TONY COMPLIES AS HE REVOLVES WE SEE VIA THE MAGIC OF TELLY THAT THE OTHER SIDE OF HIS BODY IS FEMALE.
BEN: That's better... you want another Latte?
TONI: Please...
BEN: skinny?
TONI: Thanks I've lost 2 pounds this week...
END.
Anyway, that's all from me this week, but if you have any questions about any features in the blog or want to tell me about something you've done - just give me a shout at 4Laughs@channel4.com.
Cheerio
MY MATE STILL WANTS ME TO PLAY IN HIS 5-A-SIDE TEAM. I was tempted at one point last week so I popped down to the 'hallowed pitch' to get a feel for the atmosphere and impending violence.
The Astroturf pitches are located in a pretty rough part of the city, just a stone's throw (bad analogy) from Goodison and Anfield. So the footballing tradition is rich although it's difficult to see much of the beautiful game being played out here.
There was a league game going on whilst I strolled amongst the mayhem, so I studied it fiercely. Due to the competitive nature of this fixture, a referee had been assigned to the match although he was struggling to put his authoritative stamp on proceedings. His feeble whistle seemed to only act as a suggestion to stop play which the players dutifully ignored.
A whistle needs to sound bold and should penetrate the air. His sounded like a Clanger farting.
The goalkeeper had a cigarette in his mouth too, for the WHOLE game. And he was pulling off some incredible saves which had earned him the nickname of 'The Cat' from his teammates. (I'm not sure what kind of feline smokes 10 Benson and Hedges every hour).
As I ran back towards my car I told my mate I'd get back to him...
Tune in for more of Sam's mad ramblings next week...
Find out which 4Laughs users have been out doing themselves...
WELCOME the the Editor's Blog! Here you'll find the weeks comedy cream of the crop, including news, reviews, guest blogs, the mighty Caption Competition, the new Little Laughs and lots of goodies especially for you...
5.30am Alarm went off
6.00am Got up
6.20am My journey begins
7.20am Arrive at London Euston with just 2 hours to spare, take in the boutiful sights of the station
8.20am Saw a bag shaped like a squirrel.
9.20am Off to the 'Pool
12.00pm Arrive in Liverpool, get a taxi driver who gets confused and believes I'm a new writer for Hollyoakes and going for a meeting with Phil Redmond, I try to correct him but he moves onto the relative fittness of the hollyoakes stars and could I write him a scene with them.
12.30pm I arrive at 4Laugh Towers and am greeted by the lovely Fay James or the now infamous 'Girl serving coke' in an memorably Hollyoaks scene. Introduced to all the Conker Media staff, and promptly forget all their names.
12.40pm Whisked off to help dress the set, Fay's half looks like something from a magical winter palace, my half looks like a tinsel monster vomitted. The whisked away for a slap up meal where the 'girl serving coke' made her renowned appearence, I opt for burger and chips.
1.00pm The Conker media staff descend on the shop, I follow this ritual and purchase a Dairy Milk (Cranberry and Granola) and some refreshers which I promptly scoff, get lots of tips from Fay and the other on various projects.
1.30pm Back in the office and after showing me the website and various goodies, I am tasked with writing the Comedy News. I manage a patheric 2 articles and the enegmatic words 'Stanley Baxter'.
2.00pm Sam Avery arrives and we go through the scripts ideas I have for the Christmas Sketch to see which ones work and are actually broadcastable and won#t end up with someone being potentially sued. A short list of 4 is decided.
3.00 - 5.00pm The filming of the Comedy Report. The report is divvied up between me and Sam, me chosing the bits I can't do too many mistakes with... I still manage to. A small break to devour the contents of an advent Calender I bought for Fay (we are undecided if that means we are not going to hell) then we record the 4 sketches to be narrowed down later.
5.00pm I leave the offices, bidding a firm farewell to Fay and Sam, and with a tear in my eye depart that magical place.
7.00pm Remember that I never had the tour Fay promised me :)
It's been quite a while since we heard from the Mustard Magazine competition 4Laughs ran in April, but finally it's here. As overall winner, Scott Graham (Scottthedot) was commissioned by Mustard to write his own piece of content for the magazine. And here it is...
UHT_Milk has been a busy boy being an extra in the Gavin and Stacey Christmas Special. He claims that he 'had' to pretend to look round the lingerie dept of a store. However, I have it on good authority that he requested it...
BBC's Teethgrinder has made a request to 4Laughs users for new video content for their show of the same name to air in January 2009. If you would like to get involved, go to the site, follow the instructions and send your stuff along to TEETHGRINDER...
Check out the latest Caption Comp winners and the new image - BRING IT ON!
Kellyn: "New beer aftershave makes you attractive... to snails"
P Coltrane: "Some boiling water will remove those snails in a jiffy."
Seth Gecko: "Do these count as hand luggage or 'escargot'?..."
CrookedWeasel: "After a gruelling 6 month expedition, the snails were quite dissappointed by the view from the top of Mount Timmy"
Shirl the Whirl: "If this doesn't get me that part in Star Trek, nothing will."
P Coltrane, you always seem to bring out the cruelty in me. Seth you always know when to bring the cheese and lovely to see you here Shirl, cool caption!. Great stuff people, but for crying out loud, what the heck is going on here..?
All entries for this week's Caption Comp should be posted in the Forum Thread 14 November Caption Comp.
The winner for this Caption Comp will appear in next Friday's Editor's Blog - 21 November. Good Luck!
There's another post from me on here if you fancy a gander... not plugging it or anything...
Crikey! I'm glad to see you're all back on form. Great reviews, three of which feature below...
DYLAN MORAN: WHAT IT IS TOUR review - by Scottthedot
I had the pleasure of seeing Dylan do stand-up a couple of weeks ago and I was genuinely impressed with his approach. His material is intelligent and thought provoking and yet wistful at the same time. I can't think of anyone with a similar approach and such a careful delivery. You may have seen him on the telly but please take some time to see this remarkable performer live.
Short but sweet from Scott, nice one.
RUSSELL BRAND'S PONDERLAND review - by Seth Gecko
Back for a second run, 'Ponderland' mixes Brand's unique and exuberant stand-up style with archive video clips, set around a given theme each week... It's a fun format that allows Russell ample scope for material and also the freedom to showcase his considerable talents as a performer... It's thought-provoking but above all, deliciously filthy... Just make sure you watch it with a couple of cushions laid out on the floor - your jaw will appreciate the soft landing...
Great review Bruceboy, keep yp the good work. And finally...
FRANKIE BOYLE LIVE review - by Jamhot83
In a nutshell: Glasgow's answer to Jimmy Carr. Like Carr the routine is made of of two line set-up/punchline gags that are there to shock you into laughter, and boy does it work. He doesn't have the same plotted out style of other comics such as Moran or Kaye and it is definitely not for the faint hearted or easily offended; but for sheer belly laughs he is up there with the best. Like a good boxer, Boyle's comedy will hit you hard, hit you fast and never give you a chance to get your breath back.
Three really strong reviews of some quality stand-up. Keep watching live comedy, especially in your area...
This week I want your reviews of comedy INTERVIEWS in the thread LITTLE LAUGHS - 14 November. You can review any INTERVIEWS you've seen, read or heard - serious or spoof (on TV, virals, websites, radio... ) that you loved or hated - TELL ME, I NEED TO KNOW!
The reviews should be around 70 words - but don't over do it.
Just took my brand new mouse for a spin on the Test Bed when I came across this juicy little sketch by Frankie Rage...
INT. OLD-TIME SILENT FILM STUDIO. THEY ARE IN THE MIDDLE OF A SCENE.
DIRECTOR: Cut!
THE ACTORS CARRY ON ACTING THE SCENE.
DIRECTOR: Cut! I said, CUT!
THE ACTORS STILL CARRY ON.
DIRECTOR: Oh, sorry guys...
THE DIRECTOR PUTS BOTH HIS ARMS IN THE AIR AND WAVES. THE ACTORS STOP ACTING AND EVERYBODY SMILES AND NODS.
END
Who want's to review...
Father Ted Series 3 - DVD
Desmond's Series 1 - DVD
The World of Lee Evans - DVDx2
8 Out of 10 Cats: Claws Out - DVD
Rachel Johnson's Shire Hell- BOOK
PLEASE REVIEW THESE GOODIES!!
If you want to review one of these lovelies, then simply email me with the name of the goodie you'd like with your name and address here 4Laughs@channel4.com
That's all from me this week, but if you have any questions about any features in the blog or want to tell me about something you've done - just give me a shout at 4Laughs@channel4.com.
Cheerio
MY MATE ASKED ME TO JOIN HIS 5-A-SIDE football team this week which I politely declined. It's not that I don't like playing, it's just that I have no desire to play in a violent 'prison rules' version of Association Football.
I used to play for a team that were so bad that people used to come along to watch us for a laugh. (Probably my first job in comedythinking about it.) And in the end we had this group of "supporters' who used to come along and if our asthmatic left back wasn't playing, you could hear them giggling as our shots rained down on the opponents corner flag.
We did actually win a game once. Although that was because the other team only had eight men. This small detail didn't matter to us though, as we celebrated like we'd clinched the league title which didn't go down very well with this other team. So after the match, we were all sharing a changing room, and our team must have smelt the impending violence because I remember panic sweeping through the lot of us and we all just bolted out of the building. They were so incensed that their team chased us down the high street, and through this indoor shopping centre, which must have looked fairly ridiculous, and being as unfit as we were it didn't take long for them to catch us. A couple of us had hold of a corner flag each as if we were in an outake from The Warriors but in the end, we were knackered. We'd just won our only game of the season and it had taken it out of us, so we stopped running and they caught up with us.
They were as feckless as us, and were so confused by us stopping that they stopped for a second, and then just ran right past.
One year our manager arranged a pre-season friendly against this side who were named after one of the roughest pubs in the area and I've never been so scared in all my life. The score finished a morale-boosting 17-0 to them and we were lucky to keep it that respectable. Their centre half was called Rocky and he was just a monster. He was like an end of level baddy on a computer game (Abobo off Double Dragon anyone?), and he was a complete lunatic. Their keeper constantly had a ciggie in his mouth throughout the game and was making all these incredible saves. We did actually score 1 but their manager drove onto the pitch on a motorbike and 'had a word' with the referee about the decision which was promptly changed.
At half time we were something like 12-0 down and all fearing for our lives and the manager passed round oranges for us. I remember thinking, we've gone beyond oranges at this stage. I don't think any amount of vitamin c is gonna help us here. Give me a screwdriver and maybe...
Tune in for more of Sam's mad ramblings next week...
WELCOME the the Editor's Blog! Here you'll find the weeks comedy cream of the crop, including news, reviews, guest blogs, the mighty Caption Competition, the new Little Laughs and lots of goodies especially for you...
It's back! No sooner has one finished, but a new one goes up!
This month I'm looking at the dark side of comedy... To win a day at popular comedy music magazine, The Fix, all you have to do is send in the most hilariously insulting resignation letter for poor old temp Sophie. The Fix editor, Harry Deansway, will pick the winning entry.
Danny Banks won the chance to visit myself and Sam up at 4Laughs Towers (a pokey office in Liverpool). After a slap up lunch, Danny met the team and proceeded to be funnier than Sam (bad idea). Here's a photo story of his day...
Tune in next week to hear what Danny had to say about his trip to 4Laughs...
Anna was asked to inadvertently discover 2190 people who will have their photograph taken with her signed photograph of Arthur Bostrom (APOTSPOAB)... Arthur Bostrom is most famously known for playing Officer Crabtree in the long running BBC comedy 'Allo 'Allo!
Not only has this woman travelled the world taking pictures of people with her charity shop purchase, but she also made a festival show all in aid of rasing awareness of ME!
On her adventures at the Hull Comedy Festival, Anna had the chance to meet the cast of 'the Allo Allo' stage show and she jumped at it!
Support Anna on her mad journey by visiting her website...
All is well in the land of comedy... And we can't be having that! Let's see what Caption delight you had me half choking to death over this week...
Seth Gecko: "What a coincidence - Camilla has a harness just like that at home..."
P Coltrane: "Charles is questioned by police over a fatal Piñata incident."
Jamhot83: "With a cunning rope snare, Charles' and Prince Phillip had thwarted this attempt at a fathers 4 justice demo!"
P Coltrane: "After watching David Blain's new stunt for 30 seconds, Charles's attention is drawn to a far more interesting damp pinecone."
Otterfox: "The peasant trees bore a fine crop this year."
CrookedWeasel: "The trainee ninjas hadn't quite grasped the true meaning of stealth."
I love Seth's entry and P Coltrane's David Blain caption - I think we all feel the same way. Some interesting and funny posts there, rock on 4Laughers! Wait! What the bouncing Beyonce is going on here..?
All entries for this week's Caption Comp should be posted in the Forum Thread 7 November Caption Comp.
The winner for this Caption Comp will appear in next Friday's Editor's Blog - 14 November. Good Luck!
If you read the Comedy News on C4 Comedy, then you might have noticed that a familiar face keeps popping up. Yes, it's me, your friendly editor! I've ben asked my North East Movies to write an industry blog about my weekly slog at 4Laughs and a review of one or more of the lovely comedy vids users have been uploading. If you want to see what I've been jabbering on about, check it out...
Great couple of reviews nestled in the forum - more please next time!
JOHN CARPENTER'S HALLOWEEN review - by Bruceboy
Jolly funny film this, not least 'cause it features Jamie Lee Curtis, famed for both the comic escapades of 'A Fish Called Wanda' and her father's hilarious cross-dressing in 'Some Like It Hot'. This particular outing's a tad lighter on the gags, but there's still joy to be had when the weirdo in daft attire fakes death then gets up again à la Oliver Hardy. If it ain't playing at your local flea-pit try ebay.
Erm... cheers for that Bruceboy... swiftly moving on...
'HALLOWEEN with THE SCOTTISH FALSETTO SOCK PUPPET THEATRE' review - by Seth Gecko
Unsurprisingly at this time of year, the video posting websites tend to be flooded with Halloween related escapades... One the best offerings I stumbled upon this time round starred The Scottish Falsetto Sock Puppets, and appeared on 'Funny Or Die'... Essentially based around the simple gag that 'Halloween' sounds a bit like 'Hello Ian', one sock's attempts to put on his spooky play are constantly thwarted by his dimmer friend's gloriously silly interruptions... Good, honest fun at it's best...
Congratulations guys! Nice reviews.
This week I want your reviews of comedy you've SEEN LIVE in the thread LITTLE LAUGHS - 7 November. You can review anything you've SEEN LIVE (on TV, virals, comedy clubs... ) that you loved or hated - TELL ME, I NEED TO KNOW!
The reviews should be around 70 words - but don't over do it.
I was scooting along minding my own business when I woke up to find myself sat at my computer with my credit card out! Check out this mind-bending sketch from Kellyn...
INT. DAY. ROOM.
CLOSE UP OF HYPNOTIST DANGLING A POCKET WATCH.
HYPNOTIST: You are feeling sleepy, very very sleepy... your eyelids are feeling very heavy... more and more sleepy...
PULL BACK TO REVEAL HYPNOTIST IS TALKING TO A WEBCAM.
CUT TO MAN ASLEEP IN FRONT OF A LAPTOP.
HYPNOTIST: When you hear the word ker-ching, you will awake and click on Paypal.
ENDS.
I've got some yummy new goodies fo you to review...
Father Ted Series 3 - DVD
Desmond's Series 1 - DVD
Derren Brown: Inside Your Mind - DVD
The World of Lee Evans - DVDx2
8 Out of 10 Cats: Claws Out - DVD
Jimmy Carr Live - DVD
Rachel Johnson's Shire Hell- BOOK
Digital Home Movie Making - BOOK
PLEASE REVIEW THESE GOODIES!!
If you want to review one of these lovelies, then simply email me with the name of the goodie you'd like with your name and address here 4Laughs@channel4.com
That's all from me this week, but if you have any questions about any features in the blog or the stand-up course - just give me a shout at 4Laughs@channel4.com.
Cheerio
SOME OF THE THINGS I USED TO DO FOR MONEY disgust me. In fact they disgusted me then, but I needed the cash to keep me in the glamourous lifestyle that I'd grown accustomed to. (You know, eating food and having a roof over my head, stuff like that.)
I was skint when I finished university and desperate to break into comedy, so I literally said yes to any offer that came my way. This led to me spending 12 months dressing up as Elvis every Tuesday and conducting wedding ceremonies in a tarpaulin Chapel-O-Love at some minty student night. In my impoverished state I told myself this was just another gig that would toughen me up for the future. After all, I was performing to some degree and people were laughing, right? WRONG! I came across more like Shakin Stevens, and people were laughing at me, not with me. Oh dear.
The worst moments were when boozed up first years would ask me how much I was getting for trading in my dignity. I'd wink and mysteriously say, 'oh I couldn't possibly tell you,' which they'd take as tantamount to admission that I was doing all this for free. That was too much to live with so I'd normally give them a figure, but politely ask these pissed up strangers not to divulge the magic number to the girl next to me who sold the laughing gas. They often did which led to massive rows between us. Try winning an argument with a £3.99 Elvis wig on your bonce.
One guy even started giving me abuse in the middle of a wedding ceremony. More out of frustration than respect for the holy service I used what little experience I had of dealing with hecklers to completely humiliate him in front of his new best friends. Don't mess with me buster, I thought. I may be dressed as a dead singer who married a minor, but my razor sharp wit has not deserted me and you had better remember that next time you plan on getting cheap laughs by sending grief in my general direction, sir.
"Oh f**k off, you're dressed as Elvis!" he snorted back. His friends all laughed and sloped off into the night. I was defeated.
Tune in for more of Sam's mad ramblings next week...
